(Warning: I'm getting serious this week, so if you're used to my usual kind-of-amusing maybe (?) stuff, then feel free to re-read past articles!)
Everything Happens for a Reason.
This is something that basically every person in my life who influenced my upbringing (parents and teachers alike) passed on to me. It was a way for me to rationalize outcomes, to take things as they come, and to watch as other decisions and outcomes were made. It helped me make decisions before the event even came about what my next steps should be. I’d say I’m a pretty rational person, and a huge part of it comes from this.
The last nine months for me have been anything but easy. They were rollercoasters of emotions, personal battles, love, loss, the whole nine yards. I watched important people enter and exit my life as if it was built around revolving doors. I hit long strides that seemed never ending, only to faceplant into the ground, staying there for days on end. I’ve watched ugly sunsets that once started as beautiful sunrises, felt myself drowning under pressure and stress, and have more than once cried over things that would probably have been trivial a year ago. It's come all at once and hit me hard, or it's come in waves over a prolonged period of time. It wasn’t just me that faced feelings like this either -- I’ve had friends lose relatives (immediate and extended), end long-term, serious relationships, gotten fired from jobs, struggled with body issues, and had to switch colleges. It’s heartbreaking, and you wonder how you’ll ever get back to the way you were before. It sucked, truly, and I felt I would never reach the mountain summit that I had just gotten to (and fallen from).
But through the anger, screams, and crying myself to sleep, I still felt that it was for a reason (to some degree at least). There’s a quote that says “God gave you this mountain, so show Him how you can move it”. Something amazing is coming, but I’m not ready for it yet, so giving me these roadblocks will help me greet it with open arms once it comes. So does everything happen for a reason? I like to believe it does, even though it might not always seem like it. I’m still trying to figure it out, and I’m sure you (as my reader) are too. So my advice to you is this: face oblivion with saying “I’m ready” rather than running back to your safety net. Smile for the days ahead rather than cry about the ones that have passed. You need to embrace challenge as much as you need to overcome difficulty. You need to let people in just as much as you need to tell people when to screw when enough is enough. Your parents have to let go, and you have to let them. Your friends have to move away, and so do you. You find you in times of darkness and light alike. You just have to allow yourself to get there first.