Ah, the internet boyfriend. What a weird, wonderful part of the millennial pop culture.
The internet boyfriend is a male celebrity, usually (but not limited to) a guy from a major fandom franchise (Marvel, Star Wars, Sherlock, Supernatural, etc.) who is adored and idolized by a majority of pop culture-connected people online.
I'm 100% a fandom girl. I love Star Wars, Doctor Who, and Marvel movies, so I absolutely understand the love for Tom Hiddleston, Oscar Isaac, Sebastian Stan, and David Tennant. BUT these guys have been adored by Tumblr for a few years now. That's not a bad thing, but I would also like to see others get a chance to be a part of this wonderful group of beloved singers and actors. Someone who really fits the "internet boyfriend type,' who's talented, humble, feminist, and adorable. Someone like... Dan Smith, lead singer of Bastille.
I know I've said this a million times, but Bastille is seriously my favorite band. I love everything about them. Not only is their music amazing, but the four (sometimes five) guys in the band are incredible as well! I love them all, but lead singer Dan Smith holds a very special place in my heart. He's adorable, funny, talented, and genuinely nice! Perfect internet boyfriend material!
July 14th is a very important day in the Bastille fandom because it is Dan Smith's birthday. So, in honor of his 32nd birthday, I would like to give the world 32 reasons he would make the perfect internet boyfriend.
1. Not to be shallow or anything, but first of all, look at him
He's a wonderful guy, but also, he's gorgeous! (The second picture in this set is my favorite.)
2. That adorable smile
It's so precious, you can't help but smile when you see it!
3. And he definitely has the prettiest eyes EVER
They're so blue!
4. And his HAIR
It was beautiful and gravity-defying.
5. (He shaved it off recently, but he still looks amazing)
It was pretty heartbreaking to watch it all get shaved off in the "Quarter Past Midnight" video, but he still looks good!
6. When he starts growing a bit of a beard, it's glorious
There's a reason May Dan is such a big deal in the fandom.
8. His voice is incredible
Every time he does that growl-y thing (like when he sings "drag me down" in "The Driver), I die a little.
11. I mean, how often do you see classic literature referenced in music?
"Weight of Living Pt. 1" references "The Rime of the Ancient Mariner."
12. That doesn't mean he doesn't like to have fun, though!
Yes, he's the middle banana!
13. He has great taste in movies
He's a big fan of directors like David Lynch, Stanley Kubrick, and Wes Anderson!
15. And music
Lorde, Haim, Frank Ocean, Florence + The Machine, Arctic Monkeys, To Kill A King - he listens to a lot of great stuff!
16. He's a brilliant songwriter
He's so talented when it comes to putting together the right words to convey emotion. I'm obsessed with "Our fingers traced in circles 'round its history/We brushed our hands right back in time through centuries." It's so beautiful!
17. Even though he forgets lyrics a lot
He recently performed "Choices" with To Kill A King during their Spiritual Dark Age tour, and he actually had to write the lyrics to his verse on his hand! And he forgets or mixes up his own lyrics ALL THE TIME. He's such a precious boy.
18. He’s pretty magical on the piano, too
I mean, he's not a piano prodigy or anything, but it's pretty mesmerizing to watch him play. (Also the vocals in this particular performance of "Blame" are INCREDIBLE!)
19. And sometimes he plays the drums!
Live performances of "Laura Palmer" and "Of the Night" usually feature Dan and a drum!
20. He’s the best at covers - he doesn’t even change pronouns in songs!
Dan singing the chorus to Rihanna's "Only Girl (In the World)" is seriously the best thing ever.
21. He's an adorably terrible dancer
Seriously, he's not good at all. Luckily, it's cute!
22. But he's totally aware of how bad he is
Most performances of "Of the Night" begin with a speech where he tells the audience how bad of a dancer he is. It's one of the best parts of a Bastille show!
24. Despite thinking he's just "some idiot in a band" and that no one cares what he thinks politically, he's very outspoken about what he thinks and believes.
An edit of Trump "singing" a song that criticizes people like Trump? Brilliant!
25. Whether that be through his music
At a few U.S. shows, he actually sings "won't Trump stop firing up the crazies?"
27. He's not subtle about how much he dislikes the current U.S. president
Interviewer: "If you could wedgie anyone on the planet right now, who would it be?"
Dan: "I mean, that giant orange dickhead..."
28. He also doesn't hesitate to shut down sexism
(talking about Kyle's giant shoe collection)
Interviewer: "So this is a man having a woman's hobby?"
Dan: "That's a sexist generalization."
(starts at 7:16)
29. He posts lots of adorable selfies!
His Instagram story is usually full of selfies and/or videos from concerts he goes to
30. He's insanely supportive of so many women in music
Seriously, he is SO supportive of female musicians! It's AMAZING!
31. He’s genuinely NICE
He's always so nice to fans and so supportive of other musicians. In interviews, he asks the interview just as many questions as they ask him - and is genuinely interested in their answers! I don't think he's capable of being mean or rude!
32. He's just perfect
Seriously, he's the total package! He's smart, kind, funny talented, a feminist, humble, and just all around wonderful!
In conclusion - Mark Ruffalo, Tom Hiddleston, Michael B. Jordan, Chris Evans, Sebastian Stan, and Harry Styles are all great, but Dan Smith should really be the ultimate internet boyfriend of 2018.
Happy Birthday Dan!