Almost a year ago someone very important in my life passed away unexpectedly. It was very early in the morning in January. My family had just gotten to Chicago because we were going to spend the weekend there before I left to go back to college for the spring semester. My parents came in my room at 1 or 2 in the morning and told us we had to leave because something was wrong with Grandma. I was so confused but I knew it had to be serious. I wasn't ready to accept the truth, so I told myself everything was fine.
We drove the three hours back home early in the morning. I listened to my mom cry as I tried and tried to convince myself that what I was thinking wasn't true. My Grandma isn't gone. When we arrived at the hospital my entire family was there and I found out that she had passed away.
It seemed impossible. I had just been at her house a week earlier all of us were laughing and playing cards. None of us knew that would be the last time. Before I left that evening, I hugged her and told her I loved her. I never knew that that would be the last time.
It's going to be really hard around the holidays for my family because last year she was here to celebrate it with all of us. Luckily, we had that last year with her. We need to cherish the memories we do have with her and not dwell on the thought of her not being here to make more. With that said, we all know that she's still a huge part of our lives and will be forever.
We need to remember her as she was: a sweet, kind-hearted, women who loved us with all of her heart. We don't need to remember the sad things, there is no need for tears on the days that are meant to be happy. I know Grandma is looking over all of us this Holiday Season and she's not going to want to see us crying because she isn't here with us. She's going to want to see us all together, laughing, and having fun.
The fact is that even though she can't be with us anymore, it doesn't mean we have to forget her. But remembering her does not mean being sad, it means remembering happy times and how happy of a person she was. I know we all miss her so much, especially now, but we have to continue to be strong and to love each other despite it.
Losing my Grandma was hard on me but it also helped me learn some things. Before she passed away I had taken things in my life for granted, like family and friends. I hadn't really grasped onto the concept that everything in life is only temporary. Losing her helped me realize that I need to make the most out of life, love with all of my heart, and just be a good person. Because of her I now know that I don't need negativity in my life and that I need to do what makes me happy.
You don't really know what life is going to throw at you next but if you face it head on and make the best of it, you'll make it through.
I love and miss you Grandma. There is nothing that I wouldn't give to have you back for one more day, to feel your hug one last time, and to hear you laugh again. But just know that our whole family misses you greatly and we are making every happy moment last.
All of our family will be sending love, hugs, and kisses this holiday season for you.