Experiencing FOMO in college is inevitable, but that doesn't make it suck any less.
Before I went away to college, the term FOMO had absolutely no meaning to me. To be honest, I had no idea what it even stood for. FOMO stands for “fear of missing out,” and now that I've been away from home for over four months, this is the most relevant feeling in my life.
Last week was my best friend’s birthday, and we usually celebrate it together every year. But this year, we had a problem. There were over 400 miles separating us. So, I was forced to celebrate her birthday through text messages, Instagram posts and to live vicariously through her Snapchat story.
Even though I was so happy she was having an amazing time, I felt a knot in my throat realizing that my best friend was in a new chapter of her life. She’s off in a new place, with new people, making new memories, all without me. And, vice versa. I’m doing the exact same thing right here in East Lansing. But it still doesn’t stop the tears from filling my eyes knowing that I’m not in these new memories she’s making.
FOMO is the kind of feeling that no one really understands until they experience it. And it sucks, because there’s really no fix for it (nope, not even chocolate or Netflix binges). Usually, as time goes on this should get easier to deal with, but I feel like it's opposite with FOMO. It only gets harder.
This weekend my family got a puppy. Even though they tried to include me in the process through pictures and arguments over puppy names, there was still a huge knot in my throat and tears in my eyes the day they brought him home. I was missing out on a big family event, and no FaceTime session with a faulty connection could make up for it.
Although I was happy I would be coming home to an adorable new puppy, I couldn’t stop from bawling my eyes out knowing that I wasn’t apart of these new family memories. It makes me think that if I’m only a first semester freshman, and this knot in my throat keeps growing bigger, what is it going to be like in a few years when I’m a senior? And how many more family memories am I going to miss out on?
I knew moving away would be hard, mostly because I would be away from all my friends and family. Of course I’ve made new friends in college, but it’s kind of like I have left another life at home. It’s hard to recognize that just because you move away, doesn’t mean everyone’s life pauses until you come home. Who knows if I’ll ever accept the fact that my best friends are moving on in their college life chapters without me. Or that I only get to see our “family puppy” a few months out of the year.
What I’ve come to realize is that the only way to overcome FOMO is by coming to terms with the fact that you can’t be in two places at once. You’re going to miss out. People are going to move on with their lives. You have to learn to be okay with this, in whatever way works best for you. I know all of this is easier said than done, but personally, I like to keep myself busy with schoolwork, sorority activities and other school functions I’m involved in. I find that keeping yourself busy keeps your mind off of things that you could be missing out on back at home, and involves you in your new life on your college campus.
We all should face the reality that experiencing FOMO in college is inevitable. But it’s essential to realize that even when you can’t be around your family or best friends from back home, there are so many people on your campus who probably feel the exact same way you do.
Even though this feeling hasn't gotten better over the past few months, I'm sure as I grow older it will get easier to deal with. But, as for now, it's essential to recognize that you have a support system that you can utilize. And, most importantly, don’t forget that Thanksgiving break is right around the corner.
Family puppy, here I come!
