The reason why most high school relationships rarely work out is extreme insecurity. Teenagers seem to think that the first love they have is the only one they will ever have. At 18 nobody can say they fully know who they are or what they want to be in life. Teenage years are some of the roughest years for people. That being said, I'm sure everyone has experienced some form of bullying: whether it's physical or receiving a hurtful comment that lingers in the back of your mind forever. Since these wounds are still open at this age, we struggle to accept ourselves, which is what makes us toxic to others.
How can you expect someone to love your flaws when you are still ashamed of yours? How can you expect someone to understand you when you struggle to look in the mirror and love what you see?
Being young and oblivious to things necessary for individual development like self love is the biggest reason why teenage relationships are mentally exaughsting and emotionally abusive. You blame your significant other of cheating or being sketchy because you think someone else is better than you.You'll look through their phone to see them Snapchatting someone else and you assume another man/woman has their attention and you aren't good enough. You can tell this person that they're all you want and they still won't believe you. You'll beg each other to stay in your life even when they do you wrong because you feel like you'll never find someone like them. You look like a fool for remaining on their hip after they have hurt you beyond belief and makeup excuses to try to justify what they did and why they did it. And why do you do this? Because you don't think you're strong enough to walk away and put your own happiness first and the person you are trying to please has a ton of growing up to do, and you have yet to love yourself enough to be okay on your own. You don't realize that you're destroying yourself even more by not allowing yourself to put YOU first. People don't understand their worth until a little later in life. But honey, there is NO person better than you. Realize that now so nobody will ever walk all over you again.
Insecure people lash out at you and are quick to blame you for things that you never even did. This back and fourth mental exhaustion is not normal, nor is it healthy. It's abuse.
You need to let go of anyone that causes you more pain and restriction than happiness and freedom. Love is not selfish, controlling or possessive. It is give and take. It is a mutual understanding of your significant others time and love. It's working things out as adults face to face, not ignoring cell phone calls, threatening or blackmailing. It's not just about a physical attraction, it's about sharing passions and being attracted to someone's intellect and life goals. But when you're young, all you seem to care about is looks and not enough ambition.
You should never let anyone restrict you from experiencing life to the fullest.
Moreover, you should never let your partner tell you what you can and cannot do. It is vital to learn to love yourself, your flaws and your weaknesses. I promise you that once you realize you are the biggest catch in the world, you will never tolerate nonsense again. And if you do, you now have the power to walk away and dramatically toss your hair back as you exit. Know what you have to offer and if someone can't match that and surpass that, they are NOT worth your time, energy and love. Always remember that people who try to keep you tied down are below you. Never let someone else's anchor hold you from swimming to the surface.
