As you probably know by now, the internet is angry about the Oscars. If you didn’t know this, congratulations on your brand-new internet connection. I’m glad that you decided to make this article your first ever internet experience! Unfortunately, you’re in for a major let-down. To bring everyone up to speed: people are mad because of the lack of diversity in the 2016 Oscar nominations. Every single one of the 20 acting nominees is white.
If you’re here to read a rant about this, then click away! Okay, don’t actually click away. Share it with your grandma on Facebook so she can read it once she’s done catching up on Barack Obama’s latest terrorist plot. Then you’re free to leave. I am not here to talk about diversity. We had the same problem at the Oscars last year. It’s old news. There is a much greater controversy surrounding these nominations, and I think it’s time somebody took a stand. I will do my best to defend what is right. Here I go.
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HOW DID "STAR WARS" NOT GET A BEST PICTURE NOMINATION?
I promise that will be the only use of caps lock and bold text in this article.
If you have not seen "Star Wars: The Force Awakens," congratulations on your recent birth. The world is a mess. You’re in for a rough time.
Guys, it’s time to accept the sad truth. "Star Wars" did not get a Best Picture nomination this year. I know! I hate it just as much as you do. Don’t we have enough problems in the world as it is? Donald Trump is the Republican front runner. The ice caps are melting.
Zayn refuses to go back to 1D. What have we done to deserve such madness in the world? I can’t figure it out. Humans have been nothing but respectful and loving to one another since the beginning. Okay, maybe we’ve had a few slip-ups, but none of that should matter! "Episode VII" was incredible. I can’t think of another movie in the past decade that has brought so many people together.
Each screening might as well have ended with a group sing-along of “Kumbaya” around a campfire. I know. Starting a fire in a movie theater is dangerous and probably illegal. But sometimes we have to do something crazy for the movies we love! Did any of the best picture nominees make me cry six times? No. Is that because I didn’t see them? Sure, that could come into play. But can anyone honestly say they saw "Room?" As far as I’m concerned, "Star Wars" is the only movie that came out in the past year. That’s mainly because I have a tendency to fear and ignore anything that I don’t know or understand. That’s why I refuse to accept gravity into my life.
I don’t think we should ignore the fact that all of the acting nominees at this year’s Oscars are white. I just think that people will find Chris Rock’s jokes about white people a lot funnier than mine. The fact of the matter is that sometimes people are snubbed. Sure, it’s rather unsettling that every nominee was white. But the nominees should not be taking criticism. They are still deserving of their nominations, despite the color of their skin. Also, I am aware that "Star Wars" did receive five Oscar nominations.
Best score? Give John Williams all the awards! Best visual effects? Absolutely! Nobody can forget those mesmerizing battles. Best film editing? It’s a no-brainer! "Episode VII" was edited so well that Gwendoline Christie did not even appear in the film. However, nothing would bring me more joy than seeing J.J. Abrams and the entire "Force Awakens" team accept the award for best picture.
Also, Leo winning an Oscar would be nice. Seriously. It’s just sad at this point.
