In today's day and age, we're all about the participation medal. "Oh Jimmy, you showed up! Great job, little dude; you're gonna be a star someday." Reality check, not how the world actually works. True, we all like to feel good about ourselves. But I think we may have taken that a little too far.
We want to be the best, but few people actually put in the work it takes to get there. We don't like it when people are better than us. We do everything to undermine anyone who threatens our sense of superiority. I'm guilty of it, too. But something I've found is that being second best is much better than being the best. I'd rather be the worst of my friends than the best.
By being surround by people better than me, I'm constantly challenged to grow and try harder. Before college, I never did my homework, I never studied, I never tried. I was a lazy slacker who managed to pull out some As and more Bs and I was proud. You can imagine my confusion when I wanted to go do something fun and my friends were all studying.... And then I failed that test we had while they aced it. So I started watching: How did they study? When did they start studying? At which point was it socially acceptable to devour my own body weight in chocolate? After watching, I started doing and soon enough, my test scores improved each and every time.
If you asked me during high school whether I thought I was a good friend, I'd say sure I make mistakes, but I'm pretty solid. That line of thinking went down the drain fairly quickly at college, just like my old study habits. Sure, you can attribute part of that to me growing up and maturing. But I'd like to contribute a big part of that again to the people I'm surrounded by. My friend Madison is great at really connecting with people and making you feel like the most important thing in the world during the time she's talking to you. When she says she's going to pray for you, you just know she's 100 percent serious. That blew my mind. I never give people 100 percent of my attention. I'm always on my phone, looking somewhere else, listening to another conversation a couple tables over.
Another one of my friends, Christiana (whom I affectionately call Chicken), is also great at making sure she has time for you and pouring 100 percent of herself into a relationship. Two more of my friends, Emily and Emily, are always my go to people when I need advice, someone to talk something out with, a shoulder to cry on, or just chocolate and silence. I thought I was a good friend and there for my friends in high school, but the amazing people I've become friends with in college have shown me otherwise. And I think I can say that I've become a better friend.
There are a million other examples I could list where I've learned from my awesome friends, but I can only write so much. The point is that by not being the best of my friends, maybe not even second best, I'm a much better person. I have the chance to become better. My parents always told me to find friends who were better than me, and I guess this is one very isolated event in which they were actually, surprisingly right (note the sarcasm). Instead of raising kids in a society where everyone gets a medal, let's bring back the old days where only the best did. Because only then will the rest of society step up onto the same level.
