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raising your College kid to have A Hard work ethic doesn't always mean cutting them off

If you are fine with purchasing a brand new Bentley yet refusing to loan your child $300 so they can buy food, you need to get your priorities straight.

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raising your College kid to have A Hard work ethic doesn't always mean cutting them off
Kate Schmidt

I think there is a very fine line between giving your kids too much and giving your kids too little.

As a 21-year-old attending a four-year university for a major and two minors, working two jobs, writing weekly articles, running a student organization, and working out every day while still finding time for relationships and sleep, I would say that my work ethic is pretty on par.

I say this because there is a common misconception that in order to create this type of work ethic, you need to start from rock bottom. You should pick every single penny, work seven days a week, and be totally cut off from your parent's income in order to be successful in life.

I think that is total bullshit.

My parents raised me to work hard, but not to kill myself over money. They raised me to learn how to juggle multiple projects at once, not just to work at a job from sunup to sundown. They raised me to ask for help if I need it, yet I never take them for granted. I am a busy student who makes her own income, yet my parents still help me out with rent. I don't consider myself "spoiled." I think I turned out just fine, and I will raise my kids the exact same way.

Here is a scenario to think about. Say a family makes over half a million each year, and their son goes to college. As soon as he moves out, his parents tell him that he is completely cut off. The living expenses in this new city are through the roof and the son has to figure out how to provide for himself. He ends up working twelve-hour days, never goes out, struggles to buy food, and is failing two classes because of it. He is depressed, and his family doesn't budge to help him even though they are completely capable.

Capable enough to buy two brand new cars and a cleaning service, yet their son goes to sleep crying every single night because of the stress.

Yeah, he might have a work ethic, but in my eyes, this is no way to raise your child. He will prioritize money over every grade, relationship, and experience that comes his way. Oh, and he is also completely miserable with his life.

I get it, every family's financial situation is different. Some parents may not make much money, and they have no other choice but to cut off their children. However, if you are fine with purchasing a brand new Bentley yet refusing to loan your child $300 so they can buy food, you need to get your priorities straight.

Some parents may make the statement, "Oh, well I started from nothing so you should learn how to do that too." Okay Debra, the times have changed. We live in a modern world where the cost of living is tremendously higher, it's ten times harder to find a job without initial experience, and even if you do get hired, the pay is so much lower. Now, students are much more likely to get unpaid internships rather than a paid job right away because that is all employers will accept.

We. Weren't. Raised. In. The. Same. World.

Now, there are also parents that make the same amount and give their children every cent of it. In this case, of course, work ethic isn't going to come naturally. There is no push to work, and that could be a huge issue too in the long run if the child takes it for granted.

So parents: please find a happy medium.

Set limits, negotiate budgets, encourage your kids to work off certain bills from an early age, but don't make them kill every other aspect of their life to live properly. I am forever blessed to have the parents that I do because even though I work over 40 hours a week and try to balance my own life, I find it comforting to know that they would prioritize my well-being over a car. To me, that is good parenting.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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