1. Overthinking will *BLEEP*ing kill you. 

Overthinking can and will single-handedly ruin your happiness. Your thoughts are one of the few things in life that you can control, and even though this may seem energy-intensive and unrealistic, you must control your thoughts. It becomes too easy to start thinking in "What ifs" and to create unlikely situations in your head, and before you know it, one thought has transformed into a never-ending hamster wheel of negative hypotheticals. As someone who has let anxiety control her life for quite a while, let me tell you this: I know it can be hard to end these thoughts. But, you must work at cutting off that negative cycle of thoughts before it starts. Reward yourself every time you cut off a negative series of thoughts with a positive one, whether it be by eating that extra piece of pizza, watching that extra episode of a show you love, or spending that extra $5 on a pair of sneakers. I promise that eventually, your brain will reprogram to do this process naturally.

And, most importantly, do not get caught up in the small things. No, that person did not notice the small voice crack that happened when you said "Hello" to them in the dining hall; they probably were thinking about the test they have to study for. No, that boy did not leave you on read because he suddenly decided you're a bad person and wants nothing to do with you; he probably lost connection and will reply later. No, that girl did not ignore your text for five hours because she hates your guts; her phone probably died, and she probably did not have a charger on her. These things seem so easy to tell others, but yet so hard for us to actually tell ourselves in the moment when a boy leaves us on read or when a girl ignores us.

Do whatever the *BLEEP* makes you happy. 

As a teenager, it can be easy to get caught up in doing what’s considered “normal”, “popular”, or “cool”, and avoiding what’s considered “weird”, “lame”, or “stupid”. However, I am here to tell you that anyone who uses those words or lives his or her life in terms of those words is not worth your time. Why would you want to be friends with someone who sacrifices his or her passions (and therefore, his or her happiness) because of what others may think? If you want to dance on your school’s Hip Hop dance team, do it. If you want to act in your school’s musical, do it. If you want to join your school’s Mock Trial team, do it. No matter what you do, people will always have opinions, so why live life in fear of something that is bound to happen anyway? Judgment arises from jealousy, so if someone is telling you how “lame” you are for joining the club soccer team, it’s probably just because he or she wishes they had the confidence and maturity to put aside what others may think and join it themselves. A true friend will support you in anything that makes you happy, so if someone judges you for doing what makes you happy, then clearly they do not want you to be happy. Why be friends with someone who doesn’t want you to be happy? Instead, go join that club you really want to join, and find friends who are actually worth your time.

Cut all the bull*BLEEP*. Be yourself. 

As you soon will realize when reading my writing, I absolutely despise the words “popular” and “cool”. You know what is actually cool? Being yourself. If you have to pretend to be someone you’re not for people to like you, then those people are not worth your time. Even if it takes meeting a lot of people to find the ones that you can be yourself around, you will definitely find it worthwhile when you can be your craziest, weirdest, least filtered self and not feel a single judgment coming from the people you’re with. Once you know who you are, you will realize how special you are and will not let anyone treat you any worse than you deserve. If you find yourself only sharing the good with people, or censoring everything you’re about to say because you fear how others may view you, then take a lesson from this quote and “cut the bullsh*t”.

People will always end up *BLEEP*ing disappointing you. Don’t expect *BLEEP* from anyone. 

I cannot ever sufficiently express the importance of this quote. When you meet someone, when you get to know someone, when you become friends with someone, even when you become best friends with someone, expect very little of them. This may sound cynical, but this is the most important word of advice you ever will hear. You CANNOT expect others to make you happy. You CANNOT expect others to be nice. You CANNOT expect others to do the right thing. You CANNOT rely on others to give you confidence and validate your being. No matter how well you think you know someone, no one is indebted to you, and you are indebted to no one. People want the best for themselves, and although not everyone is like this, many people will drop whoever they have to as long as they are benefitting themselves. YOU need to know your worth; YOU to know how amazing you are; YOU need to know what makes you smile; YOU need to feel confident in yourself because YOU know you deserve to, not because someone told you to. Just like everyone else, you are responsible for you and for you only; this is not selfISH, this is self-LOVE- this is knowing your worth and not letting anyone determine it for you.

Stop *BLEEP*ing complaining about your problems and *BLEEP*ing do something to solve them. 

When you are going through something, it’s easy to think, “Why me? When will I get the good karma I deserve?” But, you cannot think like this. You cannot have the mindset that you “deserve” to be happy. No, you need to make YOURSELF happy. So, simply said, if you are unhappy, do something to change that. Drop the “woe is me” attitude, stop pitying yourself, and start doing research. Use your problems to help yourself and others. For example, when I was sad about not loving my first semester of college, I went onto Safari and looked up articles on platforms like The Odyssey to try and find people with similar problems as the ones I was having, and I reached out to a girl who seemed to have been through exactly what I was going through. This changed my life immensely, and this wouldn’t have happened if I just sat there and kept complaining to my mom over text about my problems.