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Politics and Activism

The Pursuit Of Happiness

Realizing that more than one thing can make you "the happiest."

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The Pursuit Of Happiness

"I know I'll never make you as happy as ____ did."

Insert whatever person, place, or thing you want into that blank. Regardless of what you put there, the interpretation is this: only one thing can make you feel the happiest you ever have. You know what? That's totally wrong.

I made the mistake of telling the person I love the most that exact sentence. I don't really know what I was hoping for. Maybe a response along the lines of "You do make me as happy" or "Don't say things like that," which is not what I got. What I do know is that I let my self-worth reside within those 11 words, and that was a bigger mistake than actually saying them to another person.

Each one of us has a family, friends, hobbies, music, books, quotes, jobs, etc. that all have the ability to make us happy. The happiness I feel around my mom is not the same happiness I feel when I'm escaping the world into a book or when I'm taking a bubble bath. The happiness I feel when I'm blasting music in my car with my best friend is not the same as the happiness I feel when I'm working in my university newspaper office. So no, you will never make someone "as happy" as something or someone else. There's no such thing.

You will make someone a kind of happy that only you can bring them, and that's what makes each individual relationship unique. You can bring the sunshine into one person's life while bringing rainbows into another's. It is not about the competition of who or what can make someone happier — it's about the happiness you can find everything you're given.

It took me awhile to realize this, but I did make the person I love most as happy as ____ did. It was just a different kind of happy, and that's okay.

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