Everyday I wear three staple jewelry pieces: a gold watch I proudly bought myself this summer, a small diamond necklace my parents gave me on my 18th birthday, and lastly, a three stoned gold ring on my left ring finger. Now, the ring I wear is constantly mistaken for a wedding ring - seeing how it is on my wedding ring finger and looks fancy enough to be one - but sorry, I am very single and not close to marriage. What you are seeing is my purity ring.
I get it. Who actually wears a purity ring nowadays? Why do people wear them? What does it even mean to wear it? There are a lot of questions that go through people’s mind when they see it, especially young men. For me, I get asked by more men than women about it. It’s like they’ve never seen one before and they start asking a billion questions about it, but I understand where they are coming from because the meaning to the ring is different for everyone. The definition of a purity ring really does not have a universal meaning. Yes, according to the dictionary, it means that the individual who is wearing the ring is abstaining from sex until marriage, but for many people, like me, it has a much deeper meaning.
I got my purity ring when I was 13 years old. It took me awhile to figure out why I was really wearing it, but after discussing it with my parents and speaking to God about it, I realized its purpose for me. I was wearing it as a constant reminder of how precious and special I am. I am a lovable young woman, not an object. I also realized that this was a sign of trust and respect towards my parents. In the Bible it states nothing about a purity ring, but it does mention how important it is to be pure prior to marriage. The ring is a public statement that you made a pact with God and a promise to follow his want for you, but wearing a ring is not completely necessary. Yes, I wear a ring as a public reminder, but if I were to take it off that does not mean all my morals go away as well. To this day, I yearn for nothing more than to keep this promise and give this ring to my husband to physically state how I waited for him. It is something I take pride in and excites me for what the future has for me.
I asked a couple friends of mine to be vulnerable and open up to me about what their views on purity rings are. I wanted to get a male and female perspective, and you’ll be surprised by their responses.
Women:
“I wear a purity ring as sign of respect to myself, parents, and God. It is a constant reminder of the decision I made and how I plan to uphold this promise to God.”
I had three different girls tell me the same thing. The main idea of why they wear it is just to remind himself or herself not anyone else. It is a personal statement that is between themselves and the people close to them. It isn’t meant for someone else’s approval.
“To me it is a constant reminder that God re-purifies us everyday. Even though I’ve made mistakes doesn’t mean that I can’t be pure. If he is so powerful and can do all things, why would purity not count?”
A huge conversation was brought up about what the definition of purity even means. It ranges from person to person. That’s why when we talk about why people wear this ring; there is not one definition.
“If you wear a purity ring to symbolize that you are ‘pure’, meaning a virgin, then you are misunderstanding the concept of it in its entirety. I don’t believe that sex makes someone impure; through God, there is no impurity. Virginity is not what keeps you pure and you are not impure because you have had sex. You are pure because of God, and so long as He is a part of you, you cannot become otherwise. To use a purity ring as a symbol of a promise to Him is fine, but to say that if you break that promise you are impure is completely missing the point.”
Being pure is not just an earthly action, but also rather an emotional connection with God where he can purify you everyday.
“I see purity rings as a promise to God and yourself to abstain from what makes you impure. Not that God can’t purify you, but rather as an incentive to stay pure.”
Her point of view is like many others. Basically what she is saying is that once you’ve broken that promise, there is no point in wearing it. If you made the choice to participate in these acts, why would you publically display a different choice? Something to think about.
Men:
“The best part of a purity ring is that you’re making an intentional decision to respect yourself, your future spouse, and your future relationship with them. I think it’s a reminder of an everyday decision you make of what’s truly important to you in a culture that doesn’t seem to hold high standards when it comes to sexual purity. A purity ring is a small, yet significant, representation of our unique identity in Christ.”
For guys, I think it is important to remember the standard that God has called you to be. The world would be a better place if there were more men striving to have high character.
“The representation of a purity ring is a statement that you are to stay sexually pure. I think it is a great idea for dating as it gives me a mentality of where the girls’ heart is. It is a bold action to make seeing how those around you can judge you. Not every young woman wears it for the right purpose and this causes me to not know those who are true and those who are fake. Temptation is very prominent in today’s society and having a ring is a way to display their resistance.”
Because the world has come to accepting sexual behavior before marriage it has become difficult to know where a young woman's heart is when going into relationships. Men need to remember to know their limits and those they decide to pursue.
“I believe that wearing a purity ring is a huge statement to make, but it has a negative connotation overall. I feel as though it gives the Christian community an opportunity to roll their eyes at those who wear it to show off. It should be a symbol to yourself rather than the people around you.”
Sometimes a purity ring is worn for all the wrong purposes. This causes a lot of individuals to be skeptical about purity rings and if they even mean anything at all.
Looking at these different perspectives opened up my eyes and heart to what a purity ring can represent. The statements that were made varied so much and had such different impacts on each individual. It is up to you to decide what you believe it represents and your opinion to how they are looked upon.
