The decisions and influences that we compile over moments add up and last a lifetime. Toxicity is contagious. In order to live positively, one needs to purge negative influences. There is value in ask one’s self, “Does this person make me happy?” Try to figure out which people make your life more positive and keep them close while kicking everyone else to the curb. This may be an uncomfortable process, but the benefits out way the discomfort in the long run.
First, exam the source by which one derives their most common influences. One common and emerging source of influence is social media. These people may seem very desirable and exciting, but they ooze drama. Create some distance. Sometimes, the food in your fridge goes bad, just like how some people in your life “go bad” after awhile. Throw them away like the bag of fruit sticking to the bottom of your fridge. Social media is a strong influential platform in which critical thought is rarely, if ever rewarded. ‘Unfollow’, ‘defriend’, and block all the people off your social media accounts… (yes, even Tumblr). If this is too hard for you, have your best friend go through and do it for you. Often, they have strong incites in regards to what’s best for you.
Everyone has that one “friend” who calls only when she or he needs something. For example, “Hey, can you pick me up from class?” or, “Can I borrow that outfit you were wearing in that picture you posted 12 weeks ago?” If you feel emotionally drained and stressed by checking your texts or receiving phone calls, you’re not spending your day talking to the right people. Try to stick with people who send you encouraging and supportive messages throughout the day; those are the best kind of people.
Leave trashy people behind. Don’t text the person back because they “just want to cuddle.” Don’t feel like you have to do anything for anybody because you are a nice person and want to continue to be known as such. Delete the numbers of the “randos” you met at happy hour. I promise you, they probably don’t remember you anyways.
You may be a bit hesitant to remove these people from your life. I promise you that after you purge out all the bad people, your life will become much more fulfilling. Toxic people are always right, at least, in their minds. They get defensive and start taking their anger out on you. Take the time to delete numbers, people, and avoid situations that cause discomfort. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your new way of life, just stick to your principals and live with integrity. You are far too important to put others first who wouldn’t do the same for you. Don’t let people manipulate you into become something you’re not.
This requires a certain level of courage or it has been said, “When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try and control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth, just like you did.” – Anonyms.