Raise your hand if you hate public speaking.

https://giphy.com/gifs/filmeditor-mean-girls-movie...

You're not alone.

I was terrified of public speaking all throughout middle school and high school. It was most likely the worst thing that could have ever happened in a classroom, but then I shocked everyone including myself by becoming a communication major.

I liked writing and I liked talking to people so communication was the way to go. I figured public speaking was a part of the deal but it didn't really hit me until I was scheduled to fill my course requirements with a basic public speaking course.

My entire winter break leading up to the semester was spent agonizing over the fact that I had to speak in front of people over and over and over again.

It didn't matter that I had done a presentation in each of my classes. This was public speaking.

I didn't want to stand in front of the class and mess up or say something weird.

I didn't want to trip on my way up to give a speech.

I didn't want people to laugh at something I didn't intend to be funny. I wanted them to laugh at what I found hilarious.

I didn't want them to hate the speech or find it boring.

I wanted them to like me.

And I wasn't alone that semester. I was in a room full of people that felt the same way I did. It's not just me. It's not just you. This fear is universal.

The number one fear worldwide is the fear of public speaking. People fear it more than death!

Why is there so much pressure in public speaking that we'd rather die than do it?

Well when we're afraid, we go to the extremes. We're not just afraid of messing up one speech. We're afraid of being completely rejected, ostracized even.

Some psychologists would recommend Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to rationalize those extreme thoughts. Right before you go to give your speech or speak in public, remind yourself of this: if you mess up, it's not the end of the world and you will not be ostracized. Your worth is not dependent on whether or not you "um" too much or not.

People aren't going to laugh at me. They're not going to hate me just because I give a bad speech if I even give a bad speech. No one hates someone because of a speech.

The best piece of advice I learned in the many speeches I've given since the course is to be yourself. It's cheesy, but it's true.

Being yourself means to speak about things you already know about. Speak about things that matter to you. Also, realize that you're not perfect and you will mess up. You will say "um" just practice so you're not saying it every other word. Embrace those imperfections because it helps make you, YOU!