There are always things in our lives we wish we could change. Some are superficial — our weight, the clothes we wear, how our hair looks — but sometimes we want to change things that require more maintenance and discipline, such as the people we hang around with, our professions, the amount of time we spend on ourselves, how much effort we put into tasks, etc. Change is easy to think about, but it is not always easy to do, which is why most things on our to-do list do not get done. When things do not get done, we make excuses as to why, such as “I don’t have time," or “I don’t have the money for that,” or “It was too hard, so I will try again at another time." Excuses push us farther away from our goals more than anything else, but the excuse is really ourselves. We are the creators of excuses and the best way to beat them is to stop creating them. If change were easy, everyone would do it. Trying to change things in our lives can be painful and excruciatingly difficult. We tend to think of all the other people in our lives when making decisions, when the only ones who are in control of our lives are ourselves. Waiting to see results in your change can be difficult, but being unhappy with something in your life is even more difficult.

If you want to change aspects of your life, do it. I can’t guarantee that it will be easy, but I can guarantee it will be worth it. Battle the life you are living now by challenging the person you currently are. Growth is such an essential part of life and is needed to figure out how you want to live your life. No one else is in control of your happiness but yourself; therefore, if you are unhappy with your life, change it. Change it now. No one else will do it for you. Everything we need to make a change is already inside of us. We already have motivation, power and control, we just need to find ways to activate and express those qualities. Set incentives for yourself and think about the reasons why you want to change whatever you are changing. If the motivation behind this change is powerful enough, you will do it.

We are often held back from growth and change because of anger, fear, regret and resentment within us. The negative feelings prevent any positive interaction from taking place. Living a negative life will only keep you stagnant. It will cause you to think of any objection possible to the change you want to make. Instead of letting negativity discourage you, let it inspire you to grow more, to overcome those feelings and to be the best person you can be. Forgive who you need to forgive. It is not hurting them, only you. Let go of the regrets you have. You do not live in the past. Allow the anger you have against someone or something to motivate you to be the best. Use your negative emotions and let them motivate you, because they are only hurting you.

The world can be a rough, harsh place. People are going to try to crush any spirits that you have. Someone always has something to say. Know what you deserve and do not deserve. If someone’s criticism is correct, use that to push you further along in your growth process. If someone is being completely harsh and unreasonable, ignore it. You are your biggest critic and you are in control of your life, so in the end, all of the decisions are yours. In the end, you know the type of person you are, so you know what you do and do not deserve. Strive for what you do deserve.

Change can only happen if we set goals for ourselves. Goals are a necessity to mark our progress and set deadlines. No one else can make a change for us, and when we have a goal, we are more likely to stick to it. Write your goals out, set a deadline date, anything to give you that kick in the butt you need to get started. If you genuinely want to make a change to yourself or an aspect in your life, only you can do that. Really think about and consider the types of things you want in your life, and build your goals around them. Be efficient with your time, and work on yourself.

Going through change alone can be incredibly difficult and painful. The world is hard enough to battle, but doing it alone can sometimes seem almost impossible. It is important to realize that the people around us are going through their own life changes too. It is important to take care of one another, be there for each other, and listen. Offer advice to similar things you have endured, and be dependable. No one can “fix” someone else’s problems, but it is easier to endure with someone else’s accountability and dependability. Stop doing things alone. It is okay to seek help, and sometimes change is more efficient with teamwork.

Life will always be a complicated map, with intense obstacles and even simple, straight paths. At any time, you can change your route; it is just up to you. You are in control of your own life, your own happiness and your own successes and failures. You determine your outcome in the end, so if you are headed down a path you do not like, change it. It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.