As I packed up my dorm room two months too soon and headed back to my hometown, I spent the entire car ride imagining everything I could get done now that I didn't have to worry about maintaining a social life or working in the dining hall. I could finally start those new year resolutions- I could work out and do yoga every morning, learn a new language, make my way through the stack of unread books by my bed, focus on painting and creating amazing pieces of art. The problem? My days quickly became lying on the couch watching Netflix and struggling to find the motivation to sit through online classes.

Hustle culture has quickly become ingrained into the way we think about our time and our success. My timeline has always been full of influencers proclaiming that anyone can be a girl boss or a successful entrepreneur, as long as you wake up at 5 AM, work 70 hours a week, devote all of your free time to something that can make you money, and be on a constant grind to the top. This mentality is why I spent high school feeling lazy and unproductive for spending all night writing an essay and then going to bed when I could have stayed up all night working on a side business or teaching myself extra skills to build my resume. I blamed my average grades on not staying up all night and my declining mental health on not being the perfect, artificial version of me I had crafted in my head- in reality, this hustle mindset was the problem. Hustle culture wasn't motivating, it was suffocating.

It's so easy to say that productivity and having a brand or side hustle doesn't define you and shouldn't be your only definition of success. It's harder when we start measuring productivity by doing those things we've always wanted to do. I would love to believe that learning French and reading 20 books and cleaning out my closet while still having time to watch lectures and submit homework assignments will make me a happier, better person. Our generation is more stressed than ever, and having these creative or cleansing projects sounds like a great outlet, but this idealizing of self-isolation is just a more subtle hustle culture. This month has been stressful enough with moving back in with my parents and navigating Zoom. Combined with the daily threat of ourselves or our loved ones being affected by a virus that quickly is becoming a worldwide pandemic? It is almost impossible to proceed as if everything is normal and fine, as if checking items off a to-do list is the key to a positive outlook.

This news is all affecting us in different ways. We are all trying to balance new ways of managing daily life and trying to calm our anxieties. Making plans to hustle to the top or create a better version of yourself can add unnecessary pressure. While we are all working from home, let's all give ourselves a chance to slow down- prioritizing taking physical and mental breaks from the world when needed, catching up on rest, or finding ways to cope with this terrifying situation. During this isolation, let's put an end to hustle culture in any form. Let's not feel guilty or bad for taking a break or letting Netflix auto-play. In a time like this where we feel ultimately helpless in our circumstance, it is more important than ever to recognize the influences of hustle culture in our life and actively change our definition of success. Productivity in the time of coronavirus should not be measured in checked off resolutions or finished to-do lists, we actively have to decide that productivity means taking care of ourselves mental-health wise and trying to help others do the same.