One of the most frustrating feelings is feeling like you have worked so hard when in reality you have procrastinated. Trying to explain that feeling can often be difficult.

“I have no downtime.”

“Yes you do! You spent all of yesterday watching Netflix.”

“I know, but…”

You’re overworked, but that hasn’t come from toiling on a paper from the moment it’s assigned to the moment it’s due. You’re overworked because your mind has been whirling nonstop with worry. You may not have started that paper until the night before, but you can bet that it has been almost constantly present in your mind since it was assigned. You have mentally and physically exhausted yourself because of the mental whirlwind.

“You’re just being lazy…”

Maybe you’re not lazy. Maybe you’re actually anxious.

Last fall I received a Monday Morning Update newsletter email from my college, much like the others that are sent out every week. A section titled “Procrastination” stated, “We’ve all suffered from it at one time or another and, in a recent Summit article, History Professor Amy Houston explained why many students procrastinate, agonizing over writing papers and leaving them until the last minute.” This section of the newsletter identified something I had been experiencing but had trouble expressing to people without seeming lazy and unwilling to take responsibility for my own actions.

In her piece “Great Procrastination Shame-Cycle” from The Summit, Houston said, “In fact, you procrastinate because in some ways, you care too much – about your grades, about what your professor will think of you, about the kind of paper you know you’re capable of writing.” This idea sounds a little illogical. After all, if you care that much don’t you want to start as early as possible and work as hard possible?

Sometimes you do. And you sit down to start, or maybe you simply start thinking about what you’ll do for the assignment. And you start to feel anxious. Thoughts upon thoughts build up and worries upon worries accumulate. You need to just not do that assignment right now. You procrastinate because you’re too anxious not to.

The article, “But Procrastination Feels So Right...” by Kathariya Mokrue, PhD for The Huffington Post states, “If left unchecked, procrastination can become an incapacitating habit, fueled by anxiety, which in turn can fuel more procrastination. A vicious cycle ensues. Hence, it is no wonder that many people who suffer from anxiety disorders also struggle with procrastination.” When you procrastinate because you feel anxious, you get more anxious. You know that you really need to do that assignment, but you’re anxious, so you give yourself a break. But your anxiety builds as you take that break, knowing you need to do work and you continue to procrastinate.

This anxiety and procrastination cycle is likely very common. However, it is barely addressed and accepted. Simply acknowledging that your child, spouse, friend, co-worker, or anyone else in your life may not be procrastinating out of laziness, but out of anxiety is the first step to helping those people.