I’m 20-years-old and do not have my life together.
How many courses are you taking this semester? Have a job in your field yet? Interning? Are you graduating on time? 4.0 GPA? How’s your relationship going? Still living at home? What about your social life?
Damn.
These are the questions that you hear all throughout big holiday dinners from those distant relatives that are visiting, and all you want to do is hide under a blanket. Even worse, these are the questions that you are dragging through your mind when you’re sitting in class staring at an exam that you didn’t have time to study for, feeling completely and utterly disappointed.
I’ve been there. I am there.
Definition of stress? Being 20. Feeling like you don’t have time for anything because there’s about a billion things on your plate right now and you can’t even manage more than a few.
I consider myself lucky to have only reconsidered my career choices a handful of times. I'm currently completing year two of college and I can honestly say, my life is not at all composed. I’d like to say that I was successful as hell up until now, but it’s just never enough.
How in the world is everyone else making time for education, work, family, social life, relationships, eating healthy, exercising and relaxing? That’s just a short list for starters! Doesn’t anyone remember and understand being at this stage in their life? Because I swear they don’t act like it.
I could complain all day long about all of the difficulties of having to be an adult. I do not have a 4.0 GPA, I do not have my dream job and certainly have not moved out of my parents’ home yet. I occasionally wonder if I’m making the right career decisions or if I will need a backup plan. I have wasted so much time; exploring all the wrong classes, and focusing on my social life and dumb relationships over my education.
So, here I am. Unable to say that I have any clue on what I’m doing yet.
I can’t remember when I last got a full eight hours sleep because prioritizing my time is chaotic and life always manages to throw the unexpected at you. Trust me, I above anyone else would burst to look at the positive side of every situation. How is it possible, though, when time isn’t ever on our side? Last I remember, I was 16-years-old with more fun in my life than worries.
Here’s how:
Here I am; a full time college student, having survived my teenage years, completed high school, not on drugs, working toward my goals and trying to live life ... with a million demands from everyone, especially myself. However, I have the greatest parents, most loving brothers and three amazing girls that I call my best friends. These are the things that keep me going.
Reminder to self: I can do it.