During my freshman year of high school, I transferred from the public school system I had been attending my entire life to a small college preparatory school in my area. This decision was probably one of the best and most important ones in my life. Since coming to college, I have been able to reflect on what being an alumni of a private institution means to me. Below are, what I believe to be the biggest pros and cons of the New England prep school experience.
Pro: The Community
This is a favored buzzword among most private institutions. Although it is used a nauseating amount in brochures and on posters, it’s actually pretty true. If you go to to a small NE prep, you’ll get your fill of community. In my experience, this was a good thing. With every achievement, the community would be there to celebrate with you and with every tragedy, there were people who cared for you. Yes, the "everyone knowing you" aspect of the experience can get a little wary, but by the end of it, you’ll realize it’s not the worst thing to have a group of people that care that much about your life.
Con: The Money
It costs a lot to go to a preparatory school. I was very lucky because I did not have to pay the price tag value for my experience and therefore was able to attend the school without much fuss. That being said, my family and other families we knew had to make more than a few sacrifices for their child’s education. The other aspect of an expensive school comes in the form of the socioeconomic diversity of the system. This is a complicated part of the “money” topic because the ability to understand people from all economic classes is important and can be considered an important life skill. That being said, there were some people who just didn’t understand the concept of financial responsibility and it (sometimes) took a lot of energy to be around them. There’s also the assumption that everyone that goes to a private school is wealthy. This assumption can follow you everywhere, from summer job applications to meeting new people.
Pro 2: The Teachers
If you loved every class you took in high school, you’re lying. I know I didn’t. There will always be those classes that go by as slowly as possible and those that were over before you could get started. A good teacher can make the difference between a bad class and a good one. The one defining thing about prep schools, is that if you want to work there you have to search it out. You really have to want to be there and want to teach. The thing about prep school, or at least the one I went to, is that the teachers really care and are extremely passionate about each of their individual subjects. Let me clarify, I went to public school beforehand and had plenty of inspiring and wonderful teachers. And my mother is a wonderful public school teacher. Maybe it's because of the tightness of the community or the fact that they choose to work at a preparatory school for their own reasons, but I've never met a teacher that wasn’t extremely passionate about their work and didn’t care an incredible amount about each one of their students.
Con: Difficulty of Change
One of the top lessons I learned during my experience is that when an institution has been around for a few hundred years, it gets more and more difficult for change to take place. Change is difficult on any level, especially at a school. There’s a lot of pride within the preparatory system and a lot of people to go through to get stuff done. The administrative system can sometimes be confusing and secretive and it doesn’t always feel like you have a lot of control over your education, even though you’re paying to go there. I think the argument gets made too much that “you pay to go here, you choose to go here, don’t complain." I agree that if you go to or went to a prep school you should be grateful for the opportunities presented to you. Not everyone got the experience I got out of high school and I’m fully aware of that. I do believe, however, that the system can carry somewhat of a gilded feel that makes it difficult for people to accept critiques. It also doesn’t always help that if you’re at a private institution, you leave your constitutional rights at the door. All in all, you can’t be afraid to ruffle a few feathers if you actually want change to happen, this piece of advice applies to all aspects of life, not just private institutions and not just schools.
Pro: The Students
One of the really great and different things about prep school is the fact that most of the students attending choose to be there. We had to fill out an application, pay for the tuition and the books, and dress for the occasion. There’s a lot of effort that has to be put into going to and succeeding at a school like that. This means that unlike some other experiences I’ve had with educational environments, most people are there to learn and act like it. Which is nice, like the teachers, the students at my school worked exceptionally hard and are extremely dedicated to their work. It’s an incredibly motivating atmosphere to be in and most of the time, it made you feel really supported to see everyone around you working just as hard, if not harder, than you.
Con: The Dress Code
Imagine if you walked into your grandmother’s house, turned off her Sinatra (or whatever her preferred music choice may be) and turned on Fetty Wap. You may get a similar reaction to what some have experienced while breaching the subject of changing the dress code at a private school. To be fair this isn’t just a prep school problem, the way teens dress in school has been a controversial issue since way before my generation ever began complaining about it. It’s funny because before I came to college I was kind of pro dress code. I didn’t appreciate the way it was handled at my school, mostly because of some sexist undertones, but I agreed with the general idea. It’s important to know how to dress. Looking professional helps you act and think professionally. These are all valid points. The thing is that now that I’m in college, I don’t really see the point. Maybe it’s because I’ve always been able to dress myself or maybe it’s because now that I can wear leggings to class I don’t see why I didn’t in the first place. My closet is full of things I won’t wear again, my family has spent hundreds of dollars so that I wouldn’t get a detention, on top of the textbooks and tuition, and for what? Tradition? Professionalism? I would like to believe I have the capability to act professional and to be knowledgable without a pencil skirt and a cardigan. For me, a private school dress code represents every inaccurate thing people assume about me when I say I went to a prep school. It creates an exclusive environment, as well as being elitist and classist.
