It's that wonderful time of the year again. The time when the National Football League owns a day of the week and football is omnipresent. Another year where our fandom takes precedence over many other priorities in life. This is America and we are passionate about our football. Opening week is upon us and I provide you with a definitive foolproof power ranking of the 32 NFL teams as we begin another season of twists, turns, and questions about what really is a proper catch anymore. HERE WE GO:
32) Cleveland Browns (3-13 last year):
It might only be a gut feeling, but the Browns will not be in this position a month from now. There's new leadership aboard, a new no-nonsense coach at the helm, and a rejuvenated RG3 ready to lead this team to new heights. However, those are predictions for the future, and let's face it, these are the Browns. Until further notice, they are the caboose as it currently stands.
31) San Francisco 49ers (5-11 last year):
It's actually hard to believe that this team was in the SuperBowl just four short years ago. This is a completely different roster after all of the recent retirements and releases. The quarterback situation is a mess and Jim Harbaugh is over in Ann Arbor working his khaki magic with the Wolverines. Expect the 49ers to be the bottom feeders in the NFC this year.
30) Philadelphia Eagles (7-9 last year):
The Carson Wentz era is about to begin sooner than expected and that's probably for the best if this team wants to see what it has in it's precocious first-round pick. There will be growing pains in Coach Pederson's first year at the helm, but the Eagles will fly again... just not this year.
29) Atlanta Falcons (8-8 last year):
The offense should be quite lethal with Julio Jones and Devonta Freeman leading the way at the skill positions, but the defense still has way too many question marks. Unless Matty Ice has a surreal MVP caliber year, this team isn't going anywhere.
28) Chicago Bears (6-10 last year):
As long as Jay Cutler is behind center, this team will be incredibly fun to watch at times and an irritating headache the rest of the time. However, with an improved line and his top two receivers in Jeffery and White healthy, maybe Da Bears can make some noise if #6 finally emerges into an elite signal caller. I wouldn't hold my breath!
27) Tennessee Titans (3-13 last year):
This team has performed wonderfully in the preseason with an old school run-it-down-your-throat style of offense that might make fantasy owners of Murray and Henry very, very happy. Unfortunately, the team is way too young and inexperienced to be anything but a nice little story.
26) Los Angeles Rams (7-9 last year):
Bruce Arians said it best when he proclaimed the Rams to "always be an 8-8 team" after their showdown last season. This is a perennial 8-8 squad with a talented defense and a stud at the RB position in Gurley. Too many question marks in the first year back in LA to do any real damage.
25) San Diego Chargers (4-12 last year):
Is it just me or do the Chargers always seem to be a better team than their end-of-season record indicates? As long as Rivers is at the helm they have a chance, but not much more than that. This is a 9-7 team at the very best, and even that's a longshot.
24) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (6-10 last year):
The Bucs are that one team that can be a top five team just as easily as they can be a bottom five team. Jameis Winston, in much-improved shape, is a superstar-in-the-making but the young squad needs to continue to develop and future success will certainly come, maybe even as soon as this year.
23) Detroit Lions (7-9 last year):
The Lions have basically been the Browns' prettier sister these past fifteen years, but at least they've had a stable quarterback in Stafford and a once-in-a-lifetime talent in Calvin Johnson catching his passes. Unfortunately, Megatron is retired and Stafford is not getting any younger or better. They can sneak up on some teams though and will be ready to play every week under Coach Caldwell's regime.
22) New Orleans Saints (7-9 last year):
When you have a future Hall-Of-Fame QB under center, anything is possible. Brees is far from done, but this defense is likely to once again be among the very worst in the league. The miracle championship season was a long time ago, but anything can happen in a topsy-turvy NFC South.
21) Miami Dolphins (6-10 last year):
A new coach has been brought in and this team in South Beach is going to suddenly capture lightning in a bottle and dethrone the almighty empire up North, right? Yeah, probably not! Ryan Tannehill is not the second coming of Dan Marino and I think it's about time the people in Miami accept that, if they haven't already.
20) New York Jets (10-6 last year):
Why do I have my doubts about Mr. Fitzpatrick duplicating his incredible season from last year? This team can certainly win on any given Sunday with its tenacious coach and rigid defense, but they will be lucky to win 10 games once again.
19) Washington Redskins (9-7 last year):
If Mr. You Like That himself can continue to improve in the mediocre NFC East then there's no telling where this team can go. But, how many of us really expect him to duplicate last season's output, yet alone surpass it? I know I'd like to see that from Cousins!
18) Baltimore Ravens (5-11 last year):
They get back "Cool" Joe Flacco from injury and a bunch of other players who missed much of last season. The Ravens are never an easy win and will certainly be back in the Wild Card race, injuries permitting.
17) Buffalo Bills (8-8 last year):
As a result of all their issues, Rex Ryan is certainly on the hot seat if he doesn't deliver a playoff berth this year. God knows the people in Buffalo have been yearning for a playoff game this century. This team will only go as far as Tyrod Taylor takes them, which can be very far I might add. The defense needs to be unrelenting in getting after the opposing QBs.
16) Houston Texans (9-7 last year):
This may be JJ Watt's team, but he isn't throwing the pigskin around. That responsibility solely rests on the shoulders of the Brockweiler. I hope he can carry the weight of the world on those shoulders, because the expectations in Houston will be sky high.
15) Indianapolis Colts (8-8 last year):
After getting closer and closer to the big game with each passing season to begin his career, Andrew Luck couldn't stay healthy and the team took a giant step back last season. Will Robert Mathis, who's no spring chicken himself, get any help in the pass rush department? This team should honestly be ranked a lot lower than they are, but the Luck effect gives them some credence early on.
14) Oakland Raiders (7-9 last year):
Is this the year the Raiders finally return to relevancy for the first time since 2002? They have their QB, they have a stud at receiver, and they have Buffalo alum Khalil Mack terrorizing opposing offenses. The Raiders are everyone's sexy choice for under-the-radar team that will make the playoffs. Fans at the Black Hole should be very excited for this year.
13) Jacksonville Jaguars (5-11 last year):
If the Raiders are everyone's sexy choice for underrated squad ready to make the playoffs, then the Jaguars are right there with them. The offense should be explosive with the Allen brothers at receiver, but it's up to the young talent loaded defense to lead this team to the big dance. Bortles can and will become a star this year.
12) Minnesota Vikings (11-5 last year):
The Purple People Eaters would have been a top 5 team if not for the disastrous injury to Teddy Bridgewater's knee during practice. It's a shame when you possess the best running back this century and a ferocious defense, but newly acquired Sam Bradford might surprise some people cause no one expects Shaun Hill to retain his starting position at QB.
11) Dallas Cowboys (4-12 last year):
There are only three certainties in life: Death, taxes, and Tony Romo won't last an entire season behind center as QB of the Dallas Cowboys. It's a shame cause this Cowboys team is fully loaded on offense and should be a nightmare for defenses to defend as Zeke chases the all-time single-season rookie rushing record.
10) New York Giants (6-10 last year):
If Victor Cruz can get back to his pre-injury form and resume his salsa dancing ways as a complement to OBJ, this team will be incredibly difficult to beat. The NFC East is wide open and Eli Manning is, almost begrudgingly, the best QB in the division. Vernon needs to earn his massive contract getting after opposing defenses.
9) Kansas City Chiefs (11-5 last year):
Not having Justin Houston to start the season will hurt them and so will a less than 100% Charles recovering from injury. However, KC should easily be a playoff team as long as Alex Smith doesn't regress and the team beats the teams it's supposed to beat. Don't expect them to go past the divisional round, though.
8) Cincinnati Bengals (12-4 last year):
They are a deep, talented team that simply cannot seem to win a playoff game. This might be Coach Lewis's last chance to win in the playoffs as he has, arguably, his deepest team yet. No more excuses, but does anyone trust this team?
7) Arizona Cardinals (13-3 last year):
From Carson Palmer's old squad to his new squad. The Cards might've been in the SuperBowl last year if not for the Honey Badger's late season injury. The heart and soul returns along with a nice pass-rush addition in Chandler Jones, acquired in the offseason from the Patriots for Jon Cooper. Health permitting, this deep squad should contend for the title.
6) Green Bay Packers (10-6 last year):
After a down year by his lofty standards, Aaron Rodgers gets his favorite weapon back from injury in Jordy Nelson and the expectations are as high as ever in Wisconsin. Eddie Lacy might end up being the X-factor for how deep this team gets in the playoffs.
5) Pittsburgh Steelers (10-6 last year):
If Bell wasn't missing time and Martavis Bryant wasn't out indefinitely, the Steelers might've been the number one team in the power rankings. Even with the aforementioned players missing, this offense will be a force to be reckoned with. The defense, however, has to hold up their end of the bargain.
4) Seattle Seahawks (10-6 last year):
With Beast Mode retired, the Seahawks are turning to breakout star Thomas Rawls and Christine Michael to carry the load this year. Make no mistake about it, this team will continue to live and die on the Legion of Boom. Russell Wilson should be a dark-horse MVP candidate and look for the Seahawks to be right in the hunt for a title yet again.
3) Carolina Panthers (15-1 last year):
The SuperBowl runner-up brings back essentially the same roster sans Josh Norman an Kelvin Benjamin returns from his season-long injury. Expect a regression from their near-perfect regular season, but this should be a deeper team ready to return to the big dance with the reigning MVP Cam Newton leading the charge.
2) New England Patriots (12-4 last year):
Tom Brady is suspended for the first four games because of a frame job by the NFL in an effort to tarnish the legacy of the greatest quarterback to ever live. My obvious bias aside, expect the Pats to start off slow with Jimmy G at the helm, but make no mistake about it, this team will contend for the title like they always do. When you have Brady, Belichick, and Gronk, the evil empire will live to see another great season.
1) Denver Broncos (12-4 last season):
When you are the defending SuperBowl champions, you get a few benefits leading into the new season. One of them is the number one spot across all relevant power rankings until that first loss. Peyton Manning has retired and the offense isn't what it was even two years ago, but the defense proved last year that a title can be won with a ferocious defense. Von Miller is an unreal talent and this team should contend with the Pats and Steelers in a front-loaded AFC.
IT IS FOOTBALL SEASON YET AGAIN. LET US REJOICE IN UNISON!
