Coffee is a gift, maybe the secondary gift to Jesus himself, that has come down from the Heavens to bless us with smiles and warm bellies and wide (jittery?) eyes.

Around it has formed such a cool community of people who are interested in its depth, flavor notes, roasting, origins, preparation, and steamed-milky art.

We all relate to it in some way or another:

We might be utterly obsessed with it, as is my, and my sad wallet's, situation.

We might have those barista friends who talk with no end about pulling espresso shots, making latte art, and the unending argument of the best pour over method.

We might simply want to stay awake and therefore bare with the bitter, unapologetic, incredibly awful taste of a thermos full of Folger's from a drip.

We might just hate it so much that we are sure to know each and every detail of its existence in an attempt to come to that "what kind of person hates coffee" discussion fully prepared.

Whatever the case, we all know about coffee and its many facets.

The one facet that no one can argue or dispel is almost painfully obvious: when the pot (Chemex/ Aeropress/ v60/ you name it) gets down to empty there is simply no more coffee to be had. There is no wishing another beautiful cup into existence. The only way your tummy is seeing any more from where that came from is if you take the time to brew up some more goodness.

You have to get more fresh water, tenderly warm it as desired, pour the perfect amount of beans into the grinder, grind them according to taste preference. With all of these ingredients prepped for brewing, you take even more sweet time to brew up the perfect cup.

There is care that goes into that cup. There is time taken to slow down and pay attention to the nuances of what is desired for that cup. There are changes made over time as you note things you like and dislike each time you brew yourself that nice cup o' joe.

If we can fully understand and relate to this process of caring for a measly cup of black coffee, why can't we understand this same thing when it comes to caring for the heart and soul and persona behind the person each of us calls: self?

Why does it seem outrageous to lose a few minutes of sleep to have a nice quiet time in the morning with a little music, a book, maybe prayer or meditation?

Why is it outrageous to go out of our way to find a park, sit in the sun, and let our thoughts wander introspectively?

Why is it a selfish decision to choose an evening with a bubble bath and a glass of wine over a night out with friends?

It is because we live in a culture of "Yeah, I'm great, just so busy," and "Let me see if I can fit that into my calendar." We live in a day and age where all we think about is our own body or how much money we make or the husband we wish we had, while the idea of actively doing something to refuel, refresh, and care for ourselves is just way too selfish.

It is a paradox of all sorts.

We spend nearly all of our time putting ourselves first in the things that place us above others in outward and plainly seen ways (body, money, marriage), but we don't want to sacrifice a half second on ourselves in the things that would go unnoticed by others (rest, spirituality, meditation, prayer).

Our culture absolutely impresses on us that time spent for ourselves is inherently selfish, but who says that time spent being 'selfish' isn't a good thing? Who says we won't love our families better if we spent time each morning alone with a cup of coffee and a favorite book? Who says we won't be a better coworker if we skip the after-work drink for that bubble bath we have been dying for? Who says we must be antisocial if a hike alone on a Sunday afternoon is what we have been itching to do all week?

We can't pour out any love, energy, and true compassion if we are never letting ourselves be filled up again. We can't expect ourselves to always be on the go and pulling our A-game if we don't care for ourselves and make sure all is good in our own bubble of crazies.

We can't expect our coffee pot to have any more to give if we never take the time to heat the water and prep the coffee beans.

We need not continue feeling that self-care is inherently selfish.

Listen to your heart and your mind and give yourself time to just be. Do the things you love, take some time alone every now and again, and recharge your spirit. This life asks a lot of us. It is about time we stop trying to pour from an empty cup.

Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Mark 6:31 "And he said to them, 'Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.' For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat."