P.O.P.D. or "perfect ornament placement disorder" is a debilitating condition that many Christmas enthusiast suffers from each year. Common symptoms include; intense excitement while setting up the tree, prolonged staring at others ornament placements and a competition like an attitude for the best tree of the year. You may find yourself slowing down while driving past the neighbor's house just so you can see what kind of competition you're up against.

This condition is seasonal and may show onset immediately after Thanksgiving. If you think you or a loved one suffer from this disorder, please read the following and see if you have experienced any of these symptoms.

You give the stink eye to those who volunteer to help decorate YOUR tree

...Then immediately faking a smile afterward reminding yourself that you are grown and can no longer throw temper tantrums if someone messes up your work of art.

You spend more than 10 minutes visualizing how you will conduct this masterpiece before the decorating begins

If your condition is severe you may find yourself starting to talk to your tree, telling it things like "who's a good little tree?" Then immediately wondering if there actually is some underlying issue going on with you...there just might be.

You know that the placement of the first ornament on the tree is crucial

^^ this is your face when someone runs past you and puts an ornament up in a completely random spot. It takes every last drop of self-control you have to not burst out yelling "what are you thinking!?" Everyone knows the first ornament sets the whole tone for the tree!

Decorations that do not compliment each other in color or style will be subjected to removal upon your request

Being spotted by your siblings and whispering to them "what're you gonna do about it?"

You yell commands like "FILL THE GAP" repeatedly until the job gets done

When there is a gap in the tree everyone must rush to fill that space as quickly as possible, it's unacceptable and quite frankly an eye sore.

Finally, admiring your tree daily and making any excuse to sit by it

Knowing full well that over the next week you will have successfully moved all the ornaments placed by your family members to their "correct" spots without anyone suspecting a thing. Success.

Unfortunately, there is no known cure for P.O.P.D., but the good news is you never fail to have the best looking tree on the block.