So much time lost,

so much I haven’t seen or done,

so much I’ll never get to do,

that windows closed,

dreams from 17 still haunt me,

high school playlist still torments me,

the sounds give me flashbacks of memories I never got to make,

experiences I’ll never be able to have,

it was a once in a lifetime experience & opportunity,

17 was wasted, so much that could’ve been,

What will 21 be?

I never got what I wanted then, but how will things turn out now?

So much time trapped in someone else’s nightmare,

never got to live out my adolescent dreamscape,

was i just not meant to be happy?

Never had the chance to be be carefree,

live my life, eat ice cream on the pier and play “MKTO’s” “Classic" with the windows open and be a kid,

I never got what everyone else had,

it just wasn't fair,

I was the innocent naive 17 year old who had his big dreams crushed,

I was the poor kid with dreams too big

the fool who thought he could have what others did,

Am I just trapped in a stupid cycle,

And endless loop of crushed dreams,

a cycle of hope & darkness,

will it ever change?

Or has too much time passed?

Am I too old?

Maybe things will be different,

who I was then is not who I am now,

maybe I have the power to make a change?