As of late, my social media accounts have been bombarded with, no, become, a series of photos of fruit smoothie bowls. These diarrhea inducing, blood sugar spiking monstrosities, known as Playa Bowls, have become the hottest food item along the Jersey Shore, and teenage girls have recognized their beach-themed locations as an epicenter for their Instagram-driven culture. They are popular in part because they are fruit-filled and covered in Nutella and coconut and all those sweet things that drive pseudo-healthy people nuts, but also because they photograph beautifully. Not only are they good for eating, but they are especially good for getting people to recognize that yes, you went to Playa Bowls, and yes, you got a smoothie bowl.

This, however, is only the tip of the iceberg that is our generation’s self-consumed culture. Food is no longer eaten for its nutritional benefit, but for its aesthetic. Food that looks good, regardless of how it tastes, can make you look good so long as you post it to the internet. Foodie accounts, health and fitness Instagrams and vegan-raw-organic lifestyle blogs all play a part in the composition of our contemporary society, and play a part in the ever-growing narcissism that continues to eat away at the ethos of our youth. Social media has become so ingrained in our society that it actually feels like an extension of our own being, and if this extension is a reflection of ourselves, its appearance is a reflection of our appearance. So few experiences are had for personal gain, but instead for reflection on our internet persona. This is the problem with health and wellness blogs: they romanticize.

The choice to post your smoothie bowl online might make it look like all you do is eat fruits and veggies, but the reality of the situation is that after that photo is captured and posted, you can eat whatever the heck you want and treat your body like a temple or a public restroom and nobody will know the difference. But, people on the internet will respond. They will be eager to see what kale shake has been chosen for this morning’s “#gains” and will be simultaneously envious and indifferent to this health blogger’s breakfast agenda.

I get it, I often envy the lifestyle of Gwyneth Paltrow and her paleo-whatever, but in the same breath, I also know that, to some degree, beneath that internet sheath of perfection, she probably has her flaws (probably). I flick through my Instagram and Snapchat stories and see people at the beach or the gym, myself often viewing these from the clammy heat of the city sidewalks, wishing myself to return to the shore or get in well enough shape but also bored somewhat by the redundancy. Making a speculation of every-fourth-meal you eat doesn’t necessarily make you healthy, and your internet projection shouldn’t define you. It’s unhealthy, regardless of how many green juices you’re taking down a week, to live for your internet presence, and it’s even unhealthier to live for other people’s internet presences.

I would be Gwyneth Paltrow if I could, and I would eat kale shakes and quinoa for every meal if it wouldn’t drive me absolutely insane. But the reality of the situation is that I am true to myself, my unfortunate internet presence is a clear and concise representation of my somewhat unfortunate life — and I couldn’t be more proud of it.