If I see another article from someone writing about an ex-boyfriend/girlfriend or to someone who broke their heart, I'm going to cry as much as they did during the breakup. All of these articles start out so depressing and then wind up ending with something like "I'm STRONGER now" and "I'm glad I'm over you!" or "I am so much better"…okay. That’s great. Then STOP thinking about it.
Why would you want to think about someone who you claim doesn’t have a hold on you anymore? Why would you want to revisit a part of your life that you say was so difficult and heartbreaking? I understand the whole learning experience part of it but that means you take what you learned and you move on. Stop hanging out in the past and stop thinking about people that have wronged you. If you are supposedly "over" this person, then why even bother addressing them when you know they'll never see it…and probably wouldn’t even care if they did.
I think my biggest issue with these articles isn't the fact that people are constantly looking in the past. It's that people writing these articles are making it seem like it's impossible to love yourself and become stronger without having had a bad relationship first. This bothers me because a broken relationship shouldn’t be what makes you love yourself; you need to do that on your own.
Relationships come and go all throughout life but the one person we are stuck with forever is ourselves. There are so many of those Pinterest quotes that tell us that we can't truly love someone else before we love ourselves. As cheesy as some of these quotes can be, and I love cheese but am not a cheesy person, they are VERY true. We have to love ourselves so that we know what we deserve. I understand certain things shape us throughout life but a bad relationship should never be the deciding factor on whether we are strong and confident. You should never give someone else that kind of power over you especially since they may not even be there a week from now.
If you're looking to love yourself more, look to your family and your friends. Look to those people who you have known the longest and will be there for you before and after your heart gets broken. They loved you before, they will love you after, and they will always remind you of the reasons you should love yourself too.
So, as the saying goes, "Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers" (Veronica A. Shoffstall). Admire and inspire yourself while turning away from anything with thorns…except roses of course.