When I was little, I was never the type of kid who had temper tantrums in stores or cried loudly in restaurants. I really was just chilling, being a tiny human. So, when I see kids crying and wailing until their faces turn red, I want to tell them to hush because whatever it is, in the grand scheme of life, it doesn't matter.
And when I say, kids, I mean kids under about 7 because by that time, they've usually calmed down and stopped crying at everything. And they usually stop running every place they want to go and have a little less energy.
1. Wedding
I promise you that your best friend from high school does not want to look back at her wedding videos and hear your kid screaming at the top of their lungs in the background. Make them stay at home. Find a baby sitter. Whatever, just don't bring your kids, not to the reception. Besides, there's alcohol there, not knock off grape juice. Why would you WANT to bring your kids?
Upscale Restaurant
Have you ever gone to a nice restaurant? Like gotten all dressed up and you know, the total bill plus tip is gonna be over $70? But you don't even care because it's your special night. And to me, nothing can ruin the beauty and vibe of that, "Oh, I feel great but am also very hungry," than the sound of a child whining because they don't sell chicken tenders and they don't have coloring pages. It's hard to look at the menu and then you might end up not wanting food even. Just a VERY strong drink.
The DMV
I realize that everyone has to go there to get something done. I realize it's not a luxury or an exciting opportunity to go to the DMV. Nobody wants to be there. But it is infinitely worse to have children running in circles in what is usually a pretty small space, to begin with. Leave them in the car — obviously unless it's extremely hot or extremely cold. But please, just don't bring them.
Concerts
OK, if it's like Kidz Bop or whatever, then sure why not?! But I see a lot at very adult acts with explicit lyrics and sometimes stage content. So, I'm not sure that's the best place for a child. Also, I feel like that much noise would bother them and make them cry. Lastly, they can't even see anything. They're like mini-humans. So, you just wasted $80 for something they won't see or remember.
Spa or Nail/ Hair salon
These are supposed to be places where people relax or get services completed that help them feel great. These are supposed to be relaxing places. Somewhere for you to unwind and be taken care of for a little bit. But that can't happen when the person next to you has to get up every five minutes to tell their kids to be quiet or stop running, or they keep asking for snacks or money for the vending machine.
Basically, I think children should be banned from anywhere I have to go but I know that's not possible. Which maybe seems unfair but I'm not really into all of the screaming. If you're going to bring your kids out in public, which again, I do not recommend, at least make sure they're well-behaved children who don't cry just because their left ear itches.