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A Pizza Fight

How one slice can change everything.

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A Pizza Fight
spoon university

I know that I'm, at times, a foolish and idiotic person…I really realize that, but last night something happened to me that honestly surpassed every other event that has ever occurred in my life when it comes to savagery.

In Gainesville, there is a small window called “Pizza By The Slice” where students go to grab a quick slice after a night out. The line last night was especially long and we were feeling pretty hungry and anxious for our pizza.

Just as the hunger was about to take over and it was my turn in line, three girls suddenly decided they deserved to be in front of the line more than we did. This was not OK with me.

My arm shot up as fast as humanly possible to stop them from cutting. I am known from time to time to get a little sassy when someone gets in between me and my food, so I'm not necessarily proud of the next part of this story.

As my arm came between the perpetrator and myself, my mouth opened (without my consent) and out came the words, “sorry honey bun, you’re not gonna skip me now.”

This is when all hell broke loose.

I realize what I said was rude, I truly do, but to be honest, what came next was unwarranted and a little over the top if you ask me.

The violence that resulted was almost instant. My friend Mari began to spew insults after the three sorority sisters quickly banded against us. The word “bitch” was flying left and right and honestly I had lost control over the situation.

I was standing at the window, peacefully ordering my pizza as Mari nearly got into a physical altercation with the girls…this is when Victor stepped in.

Something everyone must understand here is that Victor is a very peaceful person. He is not easily angered and he is quick to act as a mediator, however, tonight sparked something inside him that I truly have never witnessed in my life. All it took to set Victor off was for the girls to call Mari and I fat. Yes, I said it, they called us fat and honestly we didn't care much, but Victor had a hard time coping.

When there’s a fight between females, usually the one who is the most ignorant and shallow will resort to appearance-based insults. I don't blame the girl, she truly did not seem very smart, so naturally the first thing she did was insult our looks as if that was the one thing that would hurt us the most.

Honestly, If she really wanted to hurt Mari and I, she could have slapped the pizza slices out of our hands and that would have done it.

As all of the insults were flying, I started to get worried because Mari was about to get punched and two men were restraining Victor from bitch slapping the girl across her face.

I was still in a peaceful place and waiting for my pizza as the girls were loudly screaming and arguing with Victor and Mari. I was trying to pacify the situation, but they had lost all control over themselves.

Mari had become a rabid animal and Victor had nearly lost all traces of humanity.

Finally, the magic words were spoken, “large pizza for Gaby!” We snatched our pizza and walked away quickly, but not before I looked into the face of my attacker and said: “I feel so sorry for you.”

The moral of the story is that I almost got into a physical fight over pizza…aka I have nearly fulfilled a childhood dream.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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