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17 Phoebe Buffay Quotes We All Still Desperately Need In Our Lives In 2019

Because Phoebe is the one and only GOAT.

Daniella Masrour

May 21, 2019

UCLA

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17 Phoebe Buffay Quotes We All Still Desperately Need In Our Lives In 2019

NBC

If you're a Friends fan, you know that Phoebe Buffay is the greatest human to have ever (fictionally) lived. She inspires us, makes us laugh, makes us cry, and really does teach some of the most important life lessons. Here are just some of the times Ms. Buffay has spoken to the soul - and 17 quotes we can all make our mantras.

1. "Boyfriends come and go, but this is for life."

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2. "I'm a really cool person."

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3. "The more I drink, the less is left for the kids to drink."

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4. "I don't even have a pla."

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5. "I may play the fool at times but I'm more than just a pretty blonde girl with an a** that won't quit."

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6. "Hi, it's Phoebe. Someone needs to take my 9 o'clock, because it's, like, 9:15 and I'm not there."

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7. "I'm, like, playing the field. You know, juggling two guys, sowing my wild oats. I'm like this oat-sowing, field-playing juggler."

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8. "Dig a little deeper."

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9. "Don't hate, you don't want to put that out into the universe."

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10. "I'm a pacifist. But when the revolution comes, I'll destroy all of you."

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11. "I have to go before I put your head through a wall."

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"Oh, you Americans always butcher the French language."

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13. "Just calm down, woman!"

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14. "Oh, yeah, that's the word I use when I can't remember the real thing."

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15. "I wish I could, but I don't want to."

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16. "Your love is like a giant pigeon crapping on my heart."

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17. "Is your boyfriend the boss of you?"

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17 Phoebe Buffay Quotes We All Still Desperately Need In Our Lives In 2019

Because Phoebe is the one and only GOAT.

In This Article:

1. "Boyfriends come and go, but this is for life."

2. "I'm a really cool person."

3. "The more I drink, the less is left for the kids to drink."

4. "I don't even have a pla."

5. "I may play the fool at times but I'm more than just a pretty blonde girl with an a** that won't quit."

6. "Hi, it's Phoebe. Someone needs to take my 9 o'clock, because it's, like, 9:15 and I'm not there."

7. "I'm, like, playing the field. You know, juggling two guys, sowing my wild oats. I'm like this oat-sowing, field-playing juggler."

8. "Dig a little deeper."

9. "Don't hate, you don't want to put that out into the universe."

10. "I'm a pacifist. But when the revolution comes, I'll destroy all of you."

11. "I have to go before I put your head through a wall."

"Oh, you Americans always butcher the French language."

13. "Just calm down, woman!"

14. "Oh, yeah, that's the word I use when I can't remember the real thing."

15. "I wish I could, but I don't want to."

16. "Your love is like a giant pigeon crapping on my heart."

17. "Is your boyfriend the boss of you?"

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No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

The world's greatest university meets the world's greatest show.

1. When you get your acceptance letter

2. When you try to figure out how class enrollment works

3. When it’s move in day

4. When you arrive on campus and see all of the attractive people

5. FROG Week

6. When you find your squad

7. When you visit DHall (RIP) or EHall for the first time

8. When you take on way too many credits

9. When you go to your first party at JMU

10. When the rival school shows up for the homecoming game (or any game really)

11. Sunday Brunch

12. When you see the infamous “preacher” for the first time

13. The first snow day

14. Madipalooza

15. When finals week rolls around

16. When you have to say goodbye

17. And when you finally get to go back

Do you have a small get-together or throw a big bash?

1. Your family and friends ask what you want for your birthday, so you give them a list of options.

2. You're super excited about your birthday the week before.

3. Your family flies in town to celebrate with you.

4. Your siblings wake you up.

5. Your friends are so excited to be with you on your big day.

6. If you work, your office might throw a party for you.

7. For your actual party, you plan a small get-together with close family and friends ...

8. ... or large celebration with everyone you know.

9. You eat the best meal you've had in weeks.

10. You devour the first piece of cake proudly.

11. You embarrass yourself somehow.

12. You get the present you really wanted but thought no one would get you.

13. You are a little sad about getting older.

14. That feeling wears off and you realize how happy you are to have family and friends to celebrate this day with you.

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