Trayvon Martin: shot and killed by George Zimmerman on February 26th, 2012.
Tamir Rice: shot and killed by Cleveland police (within two seconds of their arrival) in a park on November 22nd, 2014.
Eric Garner: Died after Staten Island Policemen put Garner in an illegal chock hold for allegedly selling cigarettes illegally on a side walk.
Michael Brown Jr.: Shot and killed by Ferguson Police Department after he was caught stealing items from a local convenience store. This shooting sparked national protests in and out of the state of Missouri.
Fast forward to 2016 and now, over 100 documented killings of unarmed black men and women by police in the United States have come to light. Over 100. Of those 100 plus killings it includes the recent shootings of Philando Castile and Alton Sterling and more recently the killing of Terrence Crutcher. Why do you need to know this? Because I'll be giving you a personal account of my reaction, my anger and outrage as well as what it's like to currently live as a person of color (trust me it's a lot worse than you think).
Why can't we get any justice? Why must we protest in order to be heard? I feel like I'm missing a piece to the puzzle here. Whenever people of color fight back, want equal opportunities or want to heard above everyone else we get shunned, we get bullets or knives in us to quiet us down because it's too much for some to handle even though we are following the law. We get pushed or looked down upon just because we aren't the same as everyone else.
I am front and center in all of these issues and sometimes I'm the victim. Anytime I'm out by myself, I'm genuinely scared. Do I have every right to be scared? Yes, because I feel like I'm being visually attacked. Whenever I see a policeman or police car, I try not to do anything "suspicious" (in this case it will be walking, selling cd's or simply just doing what other people do while they are out). When I walk into public places, I feel the daggers piercing me while I'm trying to shop. One time, I got followed by a security guard at a local Target a few days after the shooting of Philando Castile. I didn't buy the items because I had felt uncomfortable and not safe. Shouldn't I feel the opposite when I'm by myself? Shouldn't all people protected and not the people whom you choose? It just all doesn't make sense to me and it all doesn't add up. The men and women in blue should be protecting all of us, but instead they hunt us down even when we are obeying the law. Just recently I read an article that one of my facebook friends shared (I'm not sure how credible this article was) but it stated that officer who shot Terrence Crutcher is to be charged with manslaughter. The article also stated that the officers' attorney said that the officer "feared for her life because it seemed like Crutcher was going into his car to grab a weapon," even though he was clearly unarmed and not carrying anything on him all. Everyone always seems to come to this general consensus that If a person of color (black men in this case) looks suspicious or "fits the looks of a criminal on the loose" then they must automatically be a threat to officers and shot. I'm pretty sure that is how it goes now, right? Should I be careful when I reach into my backpack in public places? Yes. Do I ever ask myself, could I possibly be gunned down right now for just walking and minding my own business? Yes. I shouldn't have to reflect on these type of questions, I shouldn't have to think of these things at all. I should be able to go out and not be worried about getting dagger eyes or being followed by security. I shouldn't have to worry at all, but in 2016 I do. It hurts me, angers me and saddens me that I have to walk with such vigilance, that I have to constantly be aware of my own surroundings and be scared of the police. This is what it's like to live as a person of color in 2016. I can only imagine what new dangers lie ahead for us and the black lives matter movement.