People are beginning to understand that no relationship is perfect, and that each person in the relationship has things to work on. However, that does not mean that the relationship should be dysfunctional or unhealthy. Each person in the relationship should be trying to be better, and not just accepting things for what they are. Here are some guidelines to help people have perfectly imperfect relationships.
1. Don’t harp on the little negatives
GiphyThe longer you are with someone, the more you notice the little flaws they exhibit. It is important to point these little things out once or twice, but not often. So, if your partner forgets to close the cabinet for example, address it, but do not let it become an excessive issue. Are cabinets worth having a dispute over?
2. Highlight the little positives
The longer you are with someone, the more you overlook the little good things they do for you. It is always best to share gratitude, so that your partner always feels appreciated. So, if your partner always has coffee ready for you in the morning, acknowledge that, for it may make them feel good.
3. Kiss and greet
Depending on the weight of the day, people often forget to properly greet their partners when they see them. It is imperative to show your partner that you are glad to see them, and greeting them with a kiss is one effective way to do so. You and your partner are able to reconnect after being separate for the day, and ground yourselves back into your relationship for the remainder of the day.
4. PDA, but not all day
This is subjective to the couple, but public displays of affection tends to be very stimulating for the people involved. Occasionally holding hands or leaning on your partner are a couple of meaningful ways to display your affection publicly. It may become a bit awkward or uncomfortable to hold hands all day or lean on your partner for very long, so PDA in moderation.
5. More complimenting, less critiquing
Everyone appreciates a compliment often, so giving one to your partner is a nice gesture. Couples do have difficulty being honest without being demeaning, and that is where critiquing comes in. Couples should not avoid critiquing, but be mindful of how and what they are saying. Carefully phrasing your critiques with honesty, love, and empathy can go a long way. Try to communicate in a way that you know your partner will receive well. Some people may not be reliable or effective critics all the time, so keeping critiques to a minimum while maximizing compliments is often ideal for a relationship.
6. Money is like honey
You and your partner are likely to have different spending and budgeting habits. Each of you must try to understand each other's money personalities, and optimize the pros of each of your habits to achieve the goals you have set as a couple. Scott and Bethany Palmer, along with Dr. Kirk Cameron, have developed an assessment to help couples understand this on their website The Money Couple. Trying to coordinate finances can be sticky like honey, but when you understand each other's financial behaviors it can be just as sweet.
7. Learn what you do not know
There is no one relationship handbook, so it is important to investigate things you do not know. People are often unclear on how to adjust to changes in communication, sexual activity, and trust. If you are unsure how to handle a situation or want to make sure you are handling a situation well, get multiple books, look online, or seek an expert. Assistance is always available, because no one is perfectly perfect.
