Since I can remember, I have been a perfectionist. The catch, however, is that my perfectionism only comes into play when I really care about the task I am completing. Here is an example: I love to write. Writing and grammar are two things that I take very seriously. If I am reading an article with a spelling error, automatically that writer’s credibility diminishes.
So, in the same way, when my writing is altered in a way with which I disagree, and I am unable to refute these changes, it bothers me like a sharp itch on my back that I can’t quite reach. The whole piece is ruined and I can’t even read it myself. A similar sensation takes control with anything that I put a lot of effort into that I feel isn’t quite perfect in the end.
Dramatic, I know, but I can’t help it. Perfectionism is like a mental tick that you can’t control. You can control how you respond to it, but the tick is always there, poking at your patience.
As if being a perfectionist isn’t enough, my biggest Achilles’ heel is my habit of procrastination. I procrastinate everything that I possibly can: studying, homework, laundry, cleaning, showering, sleeping, waking up, this article...
Yet, despite my procrastination habits, I still manage to keep good grades. How? My perfectionism won’t allow anything less. Yes, I am that girl that stresses out when she receives anything below a 4.0 and yes, it is just as it sounds – I am constantly at war with myself. My character traits are constantly at war with each other.
On an average school night I sleep about four and a half hours. Why? I wait until the very last minute to do my homework, but I refuse to go to sleep without having it done. Procrastination + perfectionism = I mostly sleep on the weekends.
On an average school morning, you can see me walking to class with my hair up, glasses on, no make-up and rockin’ my comfies. Why? I woke up with ten minutes to get ready because I barely slept the night before. It’s a domino effect. Procrastination + perfectionism = I am a gremlin in the morning.
On an average afternoon, you can find me sleeping. Or, if you catch me as I am waking up, you can find me panicking about how long of a nap I took and how I will be up all night doing my homework. Domino. Effect. Procrastination + perfectionism = a deadly combination.
I know what you are probably thinking. Yes, I do it to myself. If I just would’ve done my homework the night before instead of scrambling to print at 2:40 p.m. when my class is at 3 p.m… Yes, I know. But I think of it this way.
If I did it any other way, it just wouldn’t be me. Putting myself in constant high-pressure situations helps me think on my feet. It puts me out of my comfort zone, and while some may view it as irresponsible, I think of it as character building.
In a newsroom, there is chaos. You find out about a story and then you have to jump on it as fast as possible – there is no time for delay. Long gone are the two-weeks given for papers and articles (but we all know I didn’t utilize the two weeks anyway.)
In a newsroom, there is credibility. You gather your information for an article and you have to write it with one hundred percent accuracy – there is no room for mistakes.
Procrastination + perfectionism = preparation for the real world?
Okay, okay. Maybe it is a stretch. But, in my twenty years, I still seem to be doing just fine, and as cheesy as it may sound, I truly do believe that everything happens for a reason – my procrastination and perfectionism included.
So, in summary, never let your “flaws” be labeled as flaws at all. Embrace them – they are a part of who you are. You never know; they may just lead you to your future career.
