One of the hardest pills I've ever had to swallow was that people's opinions of me truly don't matter and they never will. This was hard for me because I have always been obsessed with how people viewed me. I couldn't stand the thought of someone not liking me, and if someone didn't like me, I did everything I could to try and change their tune. I honestly believed that if someone thought I was a bad person, then that meant I was a bad person. Or, vice versa.
I based my self-worth on how other people viewed me. I mean, to me, it made sense. How could I be a good person if other people didn't view me that way? How could I be pretty? Or, funny? I could say that I was a good person, or that I was pretty or funny, but if I didn't have any evidence, and by evidence, I mean people's opinions, then it was all futile.
But then one day, kind of like a meteor just dropped out of the sky, I realized something: people see what they want to see and what people want to see never has anything to do with the truth.
Think about that for a minute. Have you ever formed an opinion on someone and then just believed that it was the truth no matter what happened, that opinion never wavered? We've all done it. Maybe it was a significant other and the thought of them being someone other than who they were in your head was too much to handle. Or, maybe it was someone that you just didn't like, whether it was because of jealousy or something else. It's human nature. We judge people to feel better about ourselves, even when preaching the falters of being judgemental.
Who you are isn't who other people say that you are. It doesn't matter what your intentions are, because if someone perceives you the wrong way, your intentions aren't going to matter. You can explain who you are or what kind of person you are until your blue in the face and someone people just don't care. That's the truth. Sometimes you just have to take a step back and realize that people are going to think what they want about you.
At the end of the day, the only person who you have to live for is yourself. The only person's opinion of you that matters is yours. If you're happy with who you are, own it. If there is something that you think you can improve on or need to change, don't wait for someone else to give you the okay. People are always going to find something wrong with you and you'll make yourself crazy if you try to meet the demands of every person you come in contact with. Be unapologetically you and the people who accept you for that are the only people who are worth being in your life.
We are who we are, and I think that's beautiful.
