It seems everyone is talking about politics these days, so I'll jump right on in as well. Here's an opinion coming out hot and fresh from a stone oven: Democracy is great, but there is one instance where it almost always fails. What is this instance? It fails when you try to account for everyone's opinion when ordering a pizza for a group.
Whenever a pizza order is put up to a vote, there is almost always a small handful of people (at most, maybe 1-2) who want some fru-fru, nonsensical, specialty pizza. Something along the lines of a buffalo fish taco pizza, or a kale and mustard pizza, or something equally unappealing to the majority of individuals in the room. Yet our inherent democratic mindset allows everyone an equal say, and we try to appease them.
And what always ends up happening? The nonsense specialty pizzas are left mostly untouched while the other normal pizzas have all been ravaged.
When it comes to pizza, there is one golden rule: everyone will always eat pepperoni. Now, pepperoni doesn't have to be everyone's favorite type of pizza, but if you like pizza you will find yourself eating it. If you don't care for pizza in the first place, then this doesn't apply to you. Plain and simple.
How do I know everyone will always eat pepperoni? Because in the end, those who asked for the nonsense pizzas ALWAYS go for a slice or two of the pepperoni! Without fail.
Going forward there are two solutions: If you are ordering pizzas for a group, never put it up for a vote and just go with pepperoni so the decision is taken out of the hands of the unwashed masses. Or the second option might be passing legislation making it a felony to ask for any pizza that isn't pepperoni yet still tries to take a slice.
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
