So let me get this out of the way - I'm a big dude. Always have been. I was never quite comfortable with my body no matter what I tried. I'd adapt my wardrobe to try to disguise my weight so I wouldn't feel so self-conscious. I accept who I am, and I'm gonna keep trying to lose weight, but it's something that bothers me every day. That said, what Joey Julius announced recently inspires the hell out of me.
When Joey - 'Big Toe Joe,' as the student section affectionately calls him - started as a redshirt freshman last year, I rooted for him from the very beginning. I remember looking at his profile - 5'10", 258 lbs - and thinking, "He's about my size, and he's a kicker. I like this guy!" Kickers are usually skinny little beanpoles, but seeing Joey nail 40-yard field goals like nothing was really something. And the way he can hit! Holy smokes!
He's a tank and he's a sharpshooter with a kick, but that's not what makes Joey great. What makes him great is something that transcends sports. This man has courage. In the wee hours of the morning on October 3, Joey made a deep and personal post on his Facebook. He wanted to tell the public of what he had been quietly struggling with and had overcome. The mighty Julius fought back and won against an eating disorder and deep depression. These are battles that, unless you fight them in your own life, are very difficult to understand. They get into your head, twist the way you think, and manipulate who you are. This past spring, his teammates, coaches, and trainers noticed the pain in him, and so they offered him the help he needed. Joey sought help and conquered his demons, and for that, I admire him with all my heart.
I deal with depression and anxiety about my body. Admitting that isn't easy for anyone, and seeking help for it is no easier. When I saw Joey come forward with this, it gave me hope. What Joey did represents something that often goes unrecognized: a guy that looks big and tough may very well be fighting battles within himself. I think everyone fights their own sort of battle - everyone. Seeing Joey have the bravery to not only find victory in his own battle but encourage others to do the same is... I don't know exactly how to say it, but it's just damned magnificent.
At the end of his post, Joey wrote, "If anyone and I mean anyone guy or girl is struggling with the the same or anything similar please message me as I will be in immediate contact to help in any way I can to provide information or insight on my struggles and I would love to help." That right there. That is strength. In a time where we are rolling back that stigma against mental health and many are on the path to finding happiness within themselves, you are a hero, Joey. You're an inspiration and beacon to a lot of folks, including me. You go, Big Toe Joe - you are the freaking man.
