The problem with being a perfectionist is well––being a perfectionist. Why do I want everything to be the best? We know that no one is perfect. Or, at least that is what we tell ourselves. If I told my professor how much time and effort I put into an extra credit assignment that involved watching a movie and writing about how it relates to material learned in class, my professor would tell me, "take it easy kid."
I guess we fall under the category of "overachievers."
We can all relate, but it is just so overwhelming especially when you have multiple tasks to do. The amount of stress we put ourselves in is self-sabotaging. Sometimes I ask myself, is it worth it? Then I look at the assignment deadline, and I am back to freaking out about doing a 'great job' on it.
Nothing is more important than your health, right? We know, but still, the world does not wait, you do what you gotta do, and you drive yourself crazy trying to be the best.
I never cease to amaze myself when I get some form of appreciation, and I get so happy, but within 10 minutes, I am on to the next thing doubting myself, forgetting the achievement, wanting to get the same response for the next assignment, and the next, and the one after.
The cycle never ends and it never will.
This madness had to stop when I treat myself to a movie or dessert or just grabbing dinner with a friend. I know that at that moment, I will feel a little better, but I also know that nothing has changed. After that treat is over, I will be back to being my usual self.
I will not stop treating myself, but here is something that happened: I was attending this event with a guest lecturer and no phones were allowed. All of a sudden, I remembered that I had forgotten to check the deadline for registration. I was freaking out inside and thought about getting up to go to the bathroom to check my phone. I could not leave it, though; it would look disrespectful.
So, I knew the lecture was going to end in about five minutes––I had to wait it out. Those first two minutes were excruciating, but when the speech ended, I was calm. When I got out, I was so relaxed and I had an "oh well, what's the worst that could happen" attitude. I found out that controlling my unhealthy habit of panicking at everything, was indeed controllable.
When it comes to treating yourself, here's a treat that will actually be good for you in the long term. Write down how much you worked for something you are proud of, and how little you worked for something you did OK in. You'll see you survived when you put your all into something!
