I was at a Christian school retreat this weekend, and out of the many things that impacted me over those three days, one section in Psalms really stuck out. Psalm 139 not only speaks about the omnipresence of God and how powerful He is, but also how deeply He loves us. I won’t write out the whole chapter here (it’s a bit long for my little article), but I will write out a few verses. Psalm 139:9-10 says:
“If I take the wings of the dawn, if I dwell in the remotest part of the sea, even there Your hand will lead me, and Your right hand will lay hold of me.”
I took this to mean that no matter how far away from God you feel and no matter how physically or emotionally far away from the community you are, God is there, and He sees you. It doesn’t matter if anybody else does -- He sees you, and He cares for you. He loves you so, so dearly, and He’ll lead you where you need to go in life. How powerful is that?
As a senior in High school, I’ve been dealing a lot with finding my purpose in life and wrestling with what God put me on this earth to do as far as a career path. Jeremiah tells us that God does have a plan for all of us; we’re all alive for a reason. And I can feel it – we all do, I think – that we’re here for a purpose and each of us holds meaning and value in this chaotic world. I’m itching to find the career path(s) God designed me to pursue, and I’m aching to dive headfirst into the adventure that is “real life” outside of school. The thought of the future scares me, but it also thrills me more than anything else. To be closer to whom God meant for me to be, to strive after my full potential, and in doing so grow closer to God and more deeply in love with Him -- that's what I want to do.
My only problem then is where to go from here. I don’t know what He wants me to pursue and I don’t know what I want to do with my life. That’s why that chapter in Psalm really struck me. Because God is with me even as I sit in this fog of cluelessness, on the brink of something great. He sees me and cares about my concerns. He cares about my future; more than I ever could. He cares about me. And He’ll guide me in the right direction, no matter where I find myself physically, spiritually, or otherwise. Proverbs 3:5-8 says:
“Trust the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.”
All I need to do is to seek Him and trust Him, and He’ll show me where to go. No matter how antsy I get waiting for the future, He has it all figured out and I need to trust that. So my prayer and mantra for this season in life, this season of exploration, are going to be the last two verses in Psalm 139:
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.”