All of my fair skinned and pale people know exactly where I am coming from with these following problems. We all love the beach, but our body may hate us for it.

1. You blend right into the sand.

I will not be mistaken for sand again! I can't help that my body loves to blend into things!

2. Being mistaken as a lobster.

Might as well cue Amanda Bynes, "Bring in the dancing lobsters!" We burn rather than tan and end up with aching bodies that hurt with every turn.

3. Sunscreen is your best friend. Aloe too!

Checking the time every hour is tedious but necessary. Apply, reapply, then reapply some more. We don't want to end up like #2.

4. Freckles are everywhere.

Why not add some more freckles to my body, sun?

5. You envy every tan person.

We all have that one friend who is blessed and tans very easily in the summer. Why can't my body do that?

6. Let's get shady.

Cover up my friends and enjoy you day at the beach under a lovely umbrella!