Paco is Desperate is an artist who has an incredible story. There is so much to learn from him and his music. He approached me for an interview recently and I was so excited!

Put down whatever you’re doing and take a seat because this is one interview you don’t want to miss out on. Keep reading to get to know Paco and his incredible story.

Hey Paco. How are you?

Oh, I'm doing well, all things considering. Wishing the weather was a little warmer.

I definitely know what you mean! Well, let's get right into some questions. What made you decide to start a career in music?

Not being good at anything else (laughs). In all seriousness, I can't remember a time where I didn't want to make music. I fell in love with punk rock at a young age. It spoke to a natural rebellious nature within me.

I didn't really have much of an identity, and in music, I found a place where I felt like I belonged. As I got older, I learned about the power that songwriting possesses as a therapeutic tool.

My music and songwriting kept me alive through some very troublesome times, as did the music and songwriting of others that I admired.

I figured I'd try to make a living doing something I enjoyed, something that centered me -- and if I could make one person feel less alone and isolated through my music like so many incredible musicians did for me, then I'd found purpose.

What genre is your music and why did you choose to make this type of music?

You know, it's a tough question. I don't like being put in a box. For the sake of categorization, I personally refer to my music as mood pop or post-emo.

In the most traditional sense, my music doesn't really fit within the definition of "emo," but it takes emo as a base and brings influences from other genres into play to form a sound that I think is uniquely me.

I put a heavy emphasis on introspective and intimate lyricism, and I try to find melodies and sounds that suit the mood and atmosphere of the lyrics with pop sensibilities.

What is the basic timeline of Paco is Desperate?

The roots of what is now known as Paco Is Desperate! began sometime in 2011.

I was performing and recording music under a number of aliases and doing a lot of experimental, really off the wall material. I was doing a lot of drugs and recording on an eight-track recorder in my living room.

Things are a bit fuzzy, but from what I can recall, a close friend was doing an acoustic emo-pop project in the vein of "The Swiss Army Romance" by Dashboard Confessional that he called Paul Morrissey Fanfiction.

After a few releases, he more or less retired his project -- but that became the biggest influence on what I eventually ended up doing with this project.

I really admired the stripped down, minimalist approach to telling emotional stories, so I kind of took that idea and ran with it.

In 2014, I started as just "Desperate!...," then as "Paco," and finally as "Paco Is Desperate!."

I released a handful of splits (one with Feral Dread, and two with Paul Morrissey Fanfiction) and an EP before I started writing "What A Bummer," which took two years to finish and was released May 10th, 2017.

Who are some artists or bands that inspire you?

That's a very long list. Here are a few (but certainly not all) -- Elliott Smith, John Frusciante, Dashboard Confessional, Tiger's Jaw, Into It. Over It, Owen, Cursive, Mineral, Real Friends, Chase Huglin, The Spill Canvas, Nirvana, Green Day, Red Hot Chili Peppers, blink-182, Alice In Chains, Senses Fail, Hawthorne Heights, Knapsack, Jets To Brazil, American Football, Brave Bird, The Get Up Kids, Brand New, Bon Iver, Coheed And Cambria, The Story So Far, Bayside, Death Cab For Cutie, Bright Eyes, Weezer, TTNG, You Blew It!, Sunny Day Real Estate, Placebo.

You said lyricism is extremely important to your music. What is the most influential or powerful lyric from another artist for you, and what's one of your lyrics that really means something to you?

From another artist: "Gloria" by Mineral contains a lyric written by Chris Simpson during the chorus. The first time I heard him yelp these words, it hit me like a truck:

And I just want to be something more than the mud in your eyes / I want to be the clay in your hands.

"Alameda" by Elliott Smith contains these words:

Nobody broke your heart, you broke your own cause you can't finish what you start.

And from "The Radiator Hums" from Cursive -- probably the most powerful lyrics I've ever heard:

Sad little boy, I know you get confused
But everyone goes through these trials of self-truth and self-abuse
When you're selfless you're so hard not to adore
When you're selfish, I just love you even more
I want to help you, but you've got to say the words:
"I want to be cured."

As far as my own lyrics go, "Tossing And Turning (What Keeps You Up At Night)" is probably lyrically the most heart-wrenching song I've ever written, especially the final stanza:

"And I'm just trying to get through to you - but sometimes you're just like a brick wall. All that bullshit, baby, I see through it all. But what do I know anyway?"

What makes you passionate about making music?

I know it must sound horribly selfish, but what makes me passionate about making music is the release it gives me. There's a certain kind of relief that comes from it -- a cathartic release.

It's almost like a medication for me, but people hear it and find something in it that's therapeutic for them.

To me, there's nothing that touches the feeling I get knowing that something I wrote or created helped someone get through something or made them feel something. So there are two aspects to that, for sure.

What does the writing process look like for you?

Well, I usually sit down with my acoustic guitar and just jam some stuff out. I'm always working on three or four chord progressions or riffs/melodies at a time, and sometimes they end up fitting together like puzzle pieces.

If I find a groove that really strikes me, I put pen to paper and something comes out -- it's hard to explain because when I write lyrics, I don't aim to tell a particular story or express a certain ideal.

I just write, and sometimes I'll have some phrases or words written down in a notebook that will kind of help form the rest, but I would say I'm a very stream of consciousness/finger on my heartbeat kind of writer.

It's likely with some of the changes coming in the next year for this project that my whole process will be flipped upside down, though.

What kind of changes can we expect from Paco Is Desperate! in the next year?

A lot of things are still early in the planning phase, but by this time next year, Paco is Desperate! will likely no longer be a solo project, but a full band.

Part of the reason I've been acoustic up until this point was out of necessity. I never really came across a group of like-minded individuals who were dedicated to doing this like I am. In small-town Ohio, people like us are kind of few and far between.

As I've expanded into different scenes in bigger cities like Toledo, I've met some very like-minded individuals and I look forward to seeing what I can achieve with some of those people.

Next spring, I'll begin writing LP2, and I'd like to do a fall 2018 tour and am currently in talks to tag along on some really awesome tours next year.

So the future really is bright and there a lot of things planned, but I'm limited in what I can talk about right now. I'm just really focused on releasing "Well, Damn" right now.

You mentioned LP2, let's talk a little bit about LP1, "What A Bummer," which you released earlier this year. What's the story behind that record, and what was your goal when you recorded it?

It's no secret that I had a drug problem, and drugs permeate from every note and word on that album. I developed a severe addiction to benzodiazepines and opioid pain medication when I was 16, and that eventually led to full-blown IV heroin use.

I started writing "What A Bummer" in July 2015 -- at the time, I was really strung out and just beginning to get caught in the grip of that monster.

My girlfriend at the time left me and I overdosed for the first time, and the next year and a half was dominated by drugs and a very hedonistic lifestyle; reckless and fast.

I fell in love with a girl who lived in Tennessee who never could return my feelings and absolutely did not deserve the expectations I put on her to do so.

My best friend and one of the few, fragile supports I had left propping me up moved about 50 minutes away and kept me at what I would call a safe distance.

My co-dependent relationship with my mom had absolutely reached a boiling point, and she fled the wreckage that was me to live out her last year in peace in the southern United States.

I was homeless by the end of 2016.

The funny part about it being called "What A Bummer" is how much of an understatement that was -- my life for the two years it took to finish that album was more than a bummer, it was a train wreck, but "What A Train Wreck" wasn't as catchy sounding.

A few days before the new year of 2017, I was drunk in a dirty motel because I had nowhere else to go and no one really wanted me around. I was out of money and didn't even have any clothes to wear.

I debated on suicide for the umpteenth time. I ended up hospitalizing myself and moving into a sober living home in January 2017.

After the fog cleared in my head, I told myself that if I wanted to do music, now was the time to do it and I couldn't make any more excuses.

I initially was gonna scrap all of "What A Bummer" and start over, but a few friends convinced me that the story needed to be told -- that there was power in that pain.

So I guess my goal in recording that record was to capture as much of the emotion and turmoil from that two year period and to take those twelve songs and put out the best album I could at the time.

It was recorded in a storage closet with a borrowed acoustic guitar, on an eight-track recorder over the course of twelve weeks.

The fact it ever saw the light of fucking day is a miracle because I should absolutely be dead right now. Three overdoses, and somehow I lived through it.

Long term, I want it to serve as a reminder of where I've been, and let it be a beacon of hope for those who are currently in a place like the one I was in.

I used to hate when people would tell me this, but it does get better. There is a way out.

How has getting clean affected your writing?

The short answer is that it hasn't. The long answer is that one of the side effects of getting clean is that life has gotten tremendously better and stable. So I'm not in that place of turmoil and grief anymore.

But now, I just write about different things. I find new emotions and feelings to key in on. For example, "Well, Damn" deals a lot with how I've struggled to maintain healthy relationships, especially romantically.

Adjusting to living a clean life is an experience in and of itself that I could fill notebooks on.

So now instead of writing songs about drugs and toxic codependency, I'm writing songs about how much of a struggle it is to find balance and adjust to living life without drugs and toxic co-dependency.

Ultimately, I write as a form of therapy -- it's how I process a lot of things.

How have you grown since "What a Bummer" and how does that come across in your new EP, "Well, Damn?"

It's funny because me and Jacob from Castle No Kings were just talking about this. I've grown leaps and bounds as a vocalist, performer, lyricist, guitarist.

I really feel like there is an evolution taking place within me creatively that will be obvious when you hear "Well, Damn."

I played him some of the new songs from the EP, and his reaction was like, "This is a big step up."

As a person in recovery, which is what I am before being a musician or performer, it's day and night from who I used to be.

I mean, this is the first time I've ever had a driver's license in my entire life. I'm 22. And I think that growth is ultimately reflected in me as a performer as well.

Speaking of Castle No Kings, I know you've mentioned them quite a few times. How has interacting with local bands like them affected you?

I owe a great debt to Castle. Jacob and I were in a few project bands in our teens, so he and I go way back, and due to the drugs and everything we kind of just went two totally different directions.

But when he heard I was clean, he came over to buy a copy of "What A Bummer" and invited me to open for Castle on their "Blind" release tour.

They gave me an in to the Toledo scene and introduced me to Cody Sizemore of Innovation Concerts who has been really supportive of me as well.

I also booked Emma Lee to perform at the second emo nite in Fremont, and have made friends with a ton of awesome bands who all have been incredibly supportive of me.

Guys like Silver Age, Awake At Last, Colour Rise, Taunting Giants, Jeffrey Oliver...they have all been so kind and welcoming to me. Having so many friends in the scene really creates this atmosphere of just supporting each other and building up one another.

That's the kind of scene I'm working hard on building in my hometown of Fremont with emo nite and bringing fresh, young, and hungry performers to the area.

What are your plans with "Well, Damn?"

I'll be releasing "Well, Damn" digitally and on cassette December 17th, 2017 from my good friend Brianna Snider's label out of Columbus/Pittsburgh, totally radical! records.

The cassette run will be limited to 40 copies. Then I'm taking a break to move into my new apartment and recover from surgery.

After that, I'll be performing at [MRB]inc's "MuZart" which is a celebration of art and music and will feature live glass blowing and painting as well as music all day. That's at the Ritz in Warren, Michigan on January 6th.

I'm currently in the process of booking out early 2018 and I'm still taking shows. My biggest goal for "Well, Damn" is to serve as the companion piece or sister piece of "What A Bummer," and for it to serve as an act of finality -- both on my lo-fi self-recorded beginnings and my acoustic career.

By this time in 2018, I will be fronting Paco Is Desperate! the band.

Sounds awesome! The future seems bright. On that note, here's the last question! What kind of tips for aspiring musicians do you have?

Be unapologetic in who you are.

Make art at all costs even if it means recording an album in a storage closet with a friend's guitar. And don't let the fucking establishment put you in a box and tell you that you have to be this or that or do this or that.

Be active in growing and supporting your local music scenes, because the bigger and healthier the scene is, the more success involved for everyone.

And absolutely use social media to your advantage. It's daunting at first, but you'll figure your system out and what works for you. AND I REITERATE -- MAKE ART AT ALL COSTS.

Tell your story, and don't apologize for anything, EVER!

*Responses have been edited.

Follow Paco is Desperate!

Facebook

Twitter

Instagram

Bandcamp