An Ode To The Oxford Comma | The Odyssey Online
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A Love Letter To The Oxford Comma

Something that needs to be said.

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A Love Letter To The Oxford Comma

My dearest love,

I know what it's like to feel unneeded, unwanted, and like if you disappeared forever, no one would know the difference. But I need you to know something—I would notice.

Sometimes people leave you out, not considering how it makes you feel. They're simply searching for leisure, style, or the satisfaction of others—all things that should pale in comparison when it comes to what you can provide.

You provide clarity and consistency. Elegance and intelligence. You are a light in my life. Without you, I feel dazed, confused, disappointed, angry, and hopeless.

But I know that I have to stay strong. I must, for you, because you are a force worth fighting for, but you're just not strong enough to fight for yourself. I must take it upon myself to fight for your rights, your justice, and your very life.

Whenever you are absent, I will bring you forth from your lonesome despair and reprimand the doer of this dreadful deed. Whenever I can, I will speak of you kindly in intellectual conversations with my peers. And above all, I will never ever fail to remember you and utilize you, for the benefit and integrity of both of our combined works and efforts.

I don't know how this monstrosity that is your common exclusion started, but by all means possible, I will attempt to put it to an end. I knew from the minute I saw you that I would love you forever, and someday, the sooner the better at that, the rest of the world will appreciate you in the same way I do.

I am not certain about many things, but if I am certain about one, it is you. Bid me good wishes in our joint endeavor, as I bid the same for you. Godspeed, my love.

Forever you obedient servant, faithful admirer, and steadfast warrior,

Aaron Doss

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