I write these articles weekly. Sometimes the topics are difficult to cultivate but this week, I had ease; I knew who I wanted to write about.
Upon my first lesson, I knew I would be skeptical. I will admit I thought I knew it all. I had been singing since I was able to make noise and I definitely did not think I needed lessons. Nonetheless, I found myself in your house sitting on a chair being asked about medicines, allergies, and things that might affect my voice, information I could easily store in the back of mind.
It did not take many lessons to realize I was more than comfortable in your company as well as someone who was obviously going to influence me far more than just in the music world. Thinking back, I never thought I would have a connection with someone like I do with you.
I guess this week’s article is an easy write for me as it is definitely something ihave had on my chest for two years now. I just want you to know how appreciative I am for you, and how much I thank you.
Ellen,
I will get the negative out the way. I hated your warmups. Even though I knew they were necessary, I will never forgive you for the endless liptrills you forced me to do no matter how many times my lips gave out. (You can laugh here, I’m not really mad, but I did loathe doing them.) Aside from that, I want to thank you for your devotion to me. I cannot imagine the number of other students you have impacted and educated, but you would never know it due to the immense dedication you gave to me during lessons, and outside of lessons. Over the past two years you have been my teacher, my role model, my therapist, and also my stand in mom at music festivals.
As my teacher, you taught me a vast repertoire of vocal pieces ranging from classical to broadway pieces. Some pieces I knew, and some I had never heard of before. My lexicon of music has since expanded from having you as a teacher. Aside from that, I have had negative connotations go along with having a “voice teacher.” “Be careful, voice teachers sometimes do not know what they are doing.” “They might try to change your voice.” I’ll just say this now, you certainly were not an amateur and you never tried to “change my voice.” Something I would literally find myself “lol-ing” at when one would mention that possible outcome.
As my role model, you showed me what it was like to be confident in one’s self and how to always carry yourself with dignity. I am not sure if you knew you were exposing these lessons, but nonetheless, you were, and I always picked up on them. Thank you.
Being my “therapist” and my “stand-in-mom at festivals” can go hand in hand but in some aspects they cannot. Each lesson started with a brief overview to our week which then lead to highs and lows. Let us please remember college acceptance letters, or should I say rejection letters. You always believed in me and even pushed for me to gain acceptance although it ended with defeat in one aspect. However, a year later none of that matters. But, at the time, it was a major heartbreak yet you always seemed to say it would all work out. You really sounded like my parents at that time, and I did not necessarily believe you, but like my parents, you ended up being right.
During these trying times and anxious awaiting for college decisions, you told me that if my initial plan did not work out, I could always go for music. At the time I brushed this off because I did not want to think of my first plan tumbling into the impossible, but now, months later, I realize that that option was not just an option for schooling yet something I still reach to in difficult times. Music has always been there and has always picked me up from places I did not know were possible to escape. You were right all along, and in a sense, I have always chosen music, and I will continue to choose music regardless of the fact that it is not my chosen major.
Picture the last festival I attended. It was certainly a time of defeat that did not lose its sting for a long while, but I got over it. After the devastating news, I found myself beside myself. But what did I find other than that? A strong hug from you. I still do not know if that huge hug and your affirmative, serious and true words made me cry less or if they made me cry more. However, this is when I realized that you had been my mom when my mom was not there. I just want you to always know that your constant concern for my feelings has always stuck with me and it still to this day makes me smile knowing I had such a connection through music.
At the ending of my days at Northwest, I found myself plopped in front of my guidance counselor telling her my struggles with getting through some of the final days in high school. I told her my sadness I had been experiencing as well as my disgust to go to school. I still remember telling her that going to voice lessons was a time all of those struggles left. I felt good during the lesson and the goodness stuck with me afterwards. If you ever doubt your success with your students, I hope that this small, once a secret, resonates with you. Although I was certainly paying for lessons, I received far more than just a service of voice lessons from you. I received such a long line of education, success, support, and sarcasm that you never had to include. I am forever thankful and grateful for you and I hope you always know this.
You are a person I will value for the rest of my life as well as someone I owe a lot of grateful thanks to.
