I have to tell you something that is very hard for me to say out loud. In fact, I’ve never told this to anyone outside my own family. Growing up in the South, in the Bible Belt, it’s just not that accepted, and I didn’t want to see it blown out of proportion, to have rumors spread about it, to lose friends over it. But it’s an important part of who I am as a person, so I feel like the time has come for me to step out of the closet. {Deep breath.} I am a liberal. There, I’ve said it.
Why is that so hard for me to acknowledge? I honestly believe it is because I grew up in a community dominated by conservatives. I learned that I shouldn’t say anything political to anyone, and I definitely shouldn’t post my political opinions online. I know that due to this, the teachers in my hometown will think differently of me. My friends won’t understand me. Nearly everyone I know will disagree with me.
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Being different from the people around you is hard. As children, we don’t realize we are different. In middle school, it’s the only thing we feel. In high school, we start to pick up on which differences are unimportant, and which ones really matter. I don’t remember the first time I realized my values were different from those of my friends; I don’t remember the first time I felt like I couldn’t be myself. But I do remember the first time I allowed my fear of difference to silence me.
I sat in US History class during my sophomore year of high school feeling like an outsider. I had always been a teacher’s pet—good at school and active in class discussions. One day in a talk about the railroad strike of 1877, I said something in defense of the laborers and the room went silent for a few seconds. I turned around (because I sat in the front row, obviously) and my classmates were staring at me. Finally someone broke the silence by completely disregarding my comment and offering another answer, to which the rest of the class agreed. I didn’t know how to react. What was wrong with my answer? It didn’t seem incorrect but somehow it was clearly wrong. I never liked being wrong, but I despised being wrong when I didn’t know why. This happened at least two more times before I realized my answers reflected equality and reform while others suggested sticking to what works and maintaining balance. I was a liberal in a land of conservatives. After a while, I stopped offering my comments because I knew they wouldn’t be accepted by anyone else in the room. I let my voice be stifled.
Eventually I started to notice it happening outside of the classroom, too. A friend would say something that struck me as unfair, but no one else spoke up, so I must be the one that is wrong. There is nothing worse than feeling like you can’t speak because others will tell you your opinion is wrong, especially people you trust. I can’t talk to some of my best friends about my beliefs, because I am scared I will lose them as a result. I love my community and I can’t imagine living anywhere else, but I wish I’d had the strength to continue to express myself when I was in school. I still don’t feel comfortable talking about my political opinions with anyone except for my dad because he is the only person that I know for sure will be unbiased, and will help me learn, rather than put me down.
I am very open about who I am on every other topic besides my political affiliation. I often forget that it is something that separates me from the people I grew up with. I can go days, even weeks sometimes, feeling like my best friends and I click on every level, and we think exactly the same, then one mention of the government and I am immediately reminded of the differences between us. Too often, a comment like “Welfare is stupid because if they really needed money, they would work harder to find a job” has silenced me. Somewhere in my teens, I learned to sit quietly while others discuss their opinions, rather than feel free to take part in a conversation about government and politics and understanding. I wish that there was something I could unlearn.
As a student at a small liberal arts college, I am probably one of the only people on campus who doesn’t regularly discuss what Hillary and Trump said on TV, or talked about in an interview. I haven’t kept up with what’s going on with the election. I don’t watch the debates. I don’t know who I’m voting for. I don’t know a thing about the issues or the candidates’ viewpoints. I realize that I have forced myself to become apolitical as a defense mechanism because I am afraid of facing that difference between myself and the people in my world.
However, I don’t want to be afraid anymore. I want to participate in the intellectual discussion about our country. I have great ideas on how to make peace and get people to live together in unity. I realize just how terrifying it is that smart people with valid ideas are keeping quiet, just like me. Eliminating one side of the conversation leads to people thinking that they can say whatever they want and that because no one disagrees, they must be right. Radicalism is brewing in areas where one political party dominates because only one voice is heard and it just keeps reinforcing itself.
I know that a dialogue is required in order for democracy to work. It won’t be easy, and it won’t be pretty. I’m not looking for a fight, or even an argument, but I do want to offer another opinion. As scared as I am of finding that my friends think I’m an idiot because I believe differently, I am more scared that I will lose my voice entirely.
I encourage people—who like me were afraid of being different, wrong, or ignored—to speak out and share your views. Not only will it strengthen your confidence in yourself, but your words will lead to discussions that are essential to understanding. By standing by your beliefs, you can share viewpoints that otherwise would be left overlooked or misconstrued. Diversity of opinions is so important in academic conversations, so I ask that you seek those who think differently and talk with them about those difficult topics you typically avoid. You will learn so much and gain an understanding of others that you didn’t have before. It’s okay to be afraid, but never let that fear prevent you from action.
