I am not the kind of person to make a public service announcement about something as trivial as an anonymous and shallow comment on Yik Yak. However, today as I was scrolling through my feed, I came across a comment that I could not just ignore. The Yik Yak was as follows:
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Dear R-word user,
The R-word needs to stop being used. I understand that you may tell me how it isn't used for malicious intent, or it was just a joke, but saying something that is so offensive on so many levels to numerous individuals, including myself, is not funny. You should never diminish the worth of another human being who is a little different than you by labeling them, especially when you're using that label with negative intent. You may think it is just another word in the human vocabulary, but it's not just a random word. It is a charged word that has real emotional ties for many people. It is rude, disrespectful, and offensive to continue to use them because you don't want to self-censor yourself. Boo hoo.
I am tired of hearing of people's disdain for “political correctness.” Not using the R-word isn't just being politically correct, it is simply having basic human decency. For me, these feelings come from a place very close to my heart. In high school, I was fortunate enough to be a part of "Best Buddies", as well as to volunteer as an intern in adaptive PE. I have been beyond fortunate to know a group of extraordinary people who have changed my life and inspire me every day. Students who have made me laugh or smile even on my worst days.These students are amazing individuals who love basketball, going to movies, hanging out, and are just some of the best friends you can ever have. They are family, and they are complex and brilliant and funny and they cannot be defined by the R-word. It pains me to hear any of my peers use the word, especially in as cruel as a way as this Yik Yak did. And saying things like "Oh, I know it bothers you, so I won't use it when you're around," is just as bad, because that doesn’t actually signify respect for me or the power that words have. It just helps you sleep at night. Maybe if people saw the personal implications that come from using the R-word, if people could understand the ostracizing effects of labeling people, they would feel more opted to eliminate it from their vocabulary. The problem is that people who don't empathize when they are using hurtful words can't view the insult from the receiving end. They can't feel the pain. They forget about how it feels when they are put down, labeled, and insulted.So to the person who decided to use the R-word today. Every person is unique and special and deserves to be recognized by his or her individuality, not a label. If you can shrug off insults or words that hurt you, good for you. But there are millions of us who can’t, and shouldn't have to. There are millions of us who are personally affected by your cruel words, and it just isn't right. You may not have even intended for your words to be malicious (though I feel you did), but your words do hurt. You may think that this was just a comment that would go unnoticed, but I can assure you that that is not the case, even if you hide behind a veil of ignorance and anonymity.
Please remember that our world is full of friction. That people are constantly at battle with ourselves and others, and it makes no sense to add to this animosity. I hope by choosing your words diligently and employing a constant sense of empathy, you can help to evolve our world into a more accepting and compassionate place where there is no accidental impulse to use the R-word. I also wish that you never have to feel what many feel when they are referred to as, or are in the presence of, the word you decided to use today.
Sincerely,
Someone who stands against the R-word
