We have made massive strides in the media, and people are finally starting to see being queer as OK. However, there are still major issues out there that need to be addressed. The fight is far from over. Here's what's still wrong, and here's how we can fix it:
1. Patriarchy is still running a mock, and we need to smash it.
The LGBTQIA+ community is still a part of the patriarchal society and, as such, works like one. More masculine-presenting individuals are given more respect and authority while feminine-presenting individuals are seen as weak and emotional. In queer-centered media, from television shows to gay late-night talk show hosts, the remnants of the patriarchy still exists. TV shows like "Glee" and "The Fosters" have OK representation of queers as long as they fit within the mold of Butch/masc-Femme. Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson fit that mold almost to a tee. I have no problem with the representation of a Butch/masc-Femme relationship as long as that’s not all that’s out there. When there is representations of femme-femme relationships in the media between two female presenting individuals, they’re viewed within a patriarchal lens. These relationships are massively over-sexualized and more for the viewing pleasure of men rather than as a loving queer relationship. That needs to change, and it can be done so with correct representation.
2. Racism is alive and well.
I’m sick of seeing "no [insert race]” on Grindr. From "Stonewall" to "American Horror Story," queers are always seen as white. Queer history has forgotten about the people of color that started the movement and how events like drag had major roots in communities of color. I shouldn’t have to argue this anymore, but I’m going to until the queer community fixes their act.
3. The idea that people are half of “whole” identities is ridiculous.
Being gender-queer, gender non-binary, gender non-conforming, bisexual and so on are shown as half-straight, half-gay, half-boy, half-girl, etc. Asexual and aromantic people are whole individuals but are often treated like they’re broken or not whole because they should need a partner of some sort. No identity should be wrapped up into what people see as a “real” identity. There is little to no visibility for these individuals in mass media. Some representation can be found across smaller Youtube channels and Tumblr blogs. While there is some movement in the community and across mass media, it's slow and small.
4. Representation of people of size is often missing.
Bigger queers don’t exist except the select few that found their way through, like Mary Lambert. When they are visible, they’re often fetishized. In TV, you see a queer of size every once in awhile and even then, it's only for a short period until they're out again. When you do see bigger queers in media, they’re almost always fetishized or the butt of a joke. If you're in a community like the bears, and you see an article about them, it's always about the more “fit” part of the community. There shouldn’t have to be reasons or excuses to love a queer of size. Being fat doesn’t mean being unhealthy.
5. The "sex-is-everything" attitude needs to stop.
Queerness isn’t just about sex, it's about who you love, too -- this includes a lack of romantic attraction or sexual attraction. As a baby queer, I felt weird because I didn’t feel the attraction some of my other queer friends had talked about. Any queer publication, and a majority of queer Youtubers, give or take a few, is largely about the sexual aspect of it. The most visible example each year is Pride. I love Pride, and I know that the first Pride was about fighting for the right to have sex and be with whomever you wanted. We shouldn’t get rid of that. There needs to be a place at Pride and within media for young queers and asexual individuals to not feel the need to be sexual. Queerness is so much more than just sex.
When are we going to start normalizing people that are out of the “norm"? The queer community is about accepting everyone. There is no standard for what a human should look like and so there shouldn’t be a standard for queers, either. It’s time to stand and let your voice be heard. Educate yourself and love everyone regardless of what identities they hold.
