Books, movies and television shows play a complicated role in our lives. We know logically that they aren’t real and we can theoretically separate their reality from our own. Yet we cannot help but compare ourselves to the lives of those that we have invested hours of our own lives into. Thus we end up unconsciously imitating tropes.
A trope is a pattern in any media content that is repeated such as:
- The action hero gets the girl in the end.
- The main character, despite all odds, stays alive in the end.
Today, I plead my case against one of my least favorite and unnamed television tropes. This trope involves characters who start dating at a young age (middle school to high school), end the series/movie in a relationship, and end up together forever.
That’s not too bad, is it?
Well… It’s not the worst trope that exists nor is it the most unrealistic. Yet, I believe, the rate at which it occurs is absurd and damaging. This trope sets up unrealistic expectations for young relationships. If these shows were actually realistic, the characters would date for a few years before breaking up and moving on. I mean, how many people actually end up with the first person they are in a relationship with? Or their second? Or their high school sweetheart? It’s just not likely.
You could call that depressing or you could call that life. But by keeping every young couple together forever, it enforces the idea that a break up is a failure of a relationship, encourages people to find their spouse as early as possible, and discourages dating multiple people to figure out what you want in a relationship.
So where does this trope appear? To list a few…
- The "Harry Potter" series (Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley) (Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley) (Molly/Arthur) (Lily/James)
- "Avatar: The Last Airbenderl" (Aang/Katara)
- "Boy Meets World" (Cory/Topanga)
- "The Hunger Games" series: (Katniss/Peeta)
- The "Twilight" series: (Edward/Bella)
- "17 Again" (Mike/Scarlet)
- "Glee" (Santana/Britney) (Kurt/Blaine) (Rachel/Jesse) (Will/Terri)
- "Awkward" (Jenna’s Parents)
This trope is unrealistic and harmful so I’m asking authors, directors, creators, writers, mothers and fathers to stop telling our youth that they will end up marrying their first love. Or their second. Or their third. Whether you marry the first person you love or the 15th, your relationship and love is just as valid as the ideal “first love.”