Let's be honest; there are way too many occurrences where we are our own biggest enemies when we may not even realize it and are just way too hard on ourselves. Also, please notice how I used the pronouns "we" instead of "you" and "ourselves" instead of "yourselves" because I am definitely guilty of each thing I'm about to list.
1. Stop telling ourselves that we aren't "good enough."
This happens extremely often; whether it be you didn't get a job position you had applied for, it didn't work out with someone you really liked, etc. Ultimately, it seems as though when things like this happen to us, we gear towards blaming ourselves for the ending results. The truth of the matter though is, it has nothing to do with being "good enough" or not! The way things happen is a set plan for how our life is supposed to be in the end. You cannot put yourself down when it doesn't happen how you want it. If you didn't get the job you wanted, so what? That just means there's bigger and better opportunities coming your way in the near future. Everyone experiences failure in the working world. You just have to keep at it. If the person you like doesn't like you back or things end, so what? You're going to find someone who is meant for you and can actually see how great you are anyways. It has no reflection on you in anyway. Why would you want someone who makes you feel like you're not "enough" anyways? You want someone who likes you in all forms that you are.
2. Stop comparing ourselves to others.
"Oh, that girl is so much prettier than me" "Wow that guy has really nice muscles, I wish I looked like him" stop. stop. stop. We are our own individual person, and we need to stop looking at others and seeing what things they have that we might not have. It in no way makes you inferior to them. Another person's beauty is not the absence of your own; please remember that.
3. Stop holding grudges.
Holding in a ton of anger towards someone who has done us wrong is only going to weigh ourselves down and inevitably make us feel worse, when we in no way deserve that at all in the first place. Forgiveness is one of the hardest things to do when someone has hurt us really badly, but has to happen in some shape or form. Not for the other person in any means, but for ourselves. We can't let others' terrible actions against us ruin our happiness forever. Also, just because we forgive does not mean we're letting that person back into our life either. We don't even have to tell them we forgive them. It will just be such a weight lifted off of our shoulders when we can finally reach that point of forgiveness. It does takes time, trust me; but I promise we will feel so much better about ourselves in the end.
4. Stop worrying and focusing on all the negatives.
We really need to remember all the great things we have going on in our lives that should outweigh all of the negatives. Also, why waste your time thinking about everything that could go wrong in a situation and not focus on what could go right? Just sit back, relax, and just go with the flow of things. If it won't matter in a year, we shouldn't be stressing it, right?
5. Stop letting toxic people affect us.
What's the point in dealing with someone who is only causing us stress and unhappiness? We are so, so, so much better than that, and those kinds of people don't deserve to be in our life. Just because they've been a part of our lives for so long does not mean we have any obligation to keep them around if they're causing more angst than joy, it's time to kick them to the curb.