"I never thought I'd find a love like this, there's no need to hide that feeling we get. Whenever we touch, we can't resist. We go back to our first date, our first kiss."

I remember the moment you kissed me that night in the balcony of our small town theater... I was so confident, and so self-assured, cocky if you will... I was sure you weren't going to kiss me, I was sure you would chicken out and then suddenly I felt your hand on my neck and your lips were on mine, and all of the sudden I remembered; I didn't know how to kiss. Crap. I felt your kiss intensify as if telling me to kiss you back, because I was sitting there like a limp pancake with duck lips. My walls of confidence were gone, my feelings of self-assurance, my stability- OH GOSH MY BALANCE! So what did I do to counteract that? I laughed... I laughed and when I heard the pain in your voice asking me what was wrong, I realized I screwed up. SO WHY NOT SCREW IT UP MORE! I ran away. Reality is a jerk, however, and running away only caused me to get kicked in the ass by Karma, resulting in a sprained ankle. BUT LET'S KEEP RUNNING! I figured if I could beat you down the stairs, I could get outside because I didn't want to give into the urge to kiss you again... So when you showed up at the other side of the room, blocking my exit, I lashed out and told you not to talk to me, and I realized I had just ruined all chances I had with you. I walked outside and barely made it to my car without crying. I couldn't let you know that I was falling for you...

"Later on we take a walk, good thing she likes to talk because I can't think of what to say.."

I watched you walk through the snow in your damn capris towards the bench I was sitting on. You had walked all the way across town in the snowstorm to see me. I felt bad for knowing that you were hopeful walking there.... I wasn't going to tell you I was in love with you, I wasn't going to tell you anything you wanted to hear.. I was going to tell you I didn't have feelings for you because if I told you the truth, life would be too real.... I watched you get closer and my whole exterior diminished. I wanted to be in your arms, I wanted to bury my head in your shoulder and cry. I wanted you. But I lied...

I watched your face sink as I lied through my teeth, trying to convince myself if I could just lie to you, my feelings would go away, and I could go back to being a good Christian girl. I didn't realize that I would literally change the way you looked at love...

I never forgave myself for that...

"I stand in fear as she gets near, then everything's okay.."

You stood by me through my biggest crush on a girl I couldn't have. You planned a scavenger hunt for my birthday, that ended in her asking me out. When she didn't you held me. She got more distant and angry in the weeks following that, and when she finally snapped at me in the hallway the night before Christmas break, you blocked the path of her fist and even blocked the words from hitting my skin somehow, and I sat on the floor and sobbed, and you kept your hand on my heart, because you said you could see it beating out of my chest. You helped me get to the car, and you sat in the backseat with me, even though you get carsick because you wouldn't leave my side. I didn't even give you the time of day, because I was so wrapped up in Hurricane Hannah, that I didn't even see you had just defended me with no reward... I didn't even notice you were holding my hand until you weren't anymore. I forget about the things you've done for me too often.

"Looking back on what we had, it never went away, she still makes me feel it every day."

I guess I never really thought about what I did to you that night, until 2 years later, I was laying in your bed, with your head on my chest, and your delicate fingers tracing circles across my stomach through my sweater. Without thinking, I ran my fingers through your hair, and you smiled at me. It felt like you had never left my heart. I had loved you since I met you, but I had been hooked since the night you broke down my walls and kissed me. You promised me that night that things would be okay, and I didn't trust you enough. But somehow, 2 years passed and we managed to find our way back to each other... Everything leads back to that first kiss. Every time you've kissed me since then, I laugh in the back of my mind because I wouldn't have been able to be so comfortable then, but getting to fall for you has made me a much stronger, more confident woman. I know sometimes you doubt the way I feel for you, but I already lost you once. I won't let you ever go without knowing how I feel now because I couldn't stand to see you that upset again...

I'm so blessed that our first kiss wasn't perfect, because it was a joke that kept us going for so many years, and our friendship only built from there... And somehow I found my way back to you... And as you tell me so often... forever and always.