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Why Oreo Should Stop Making Weird Flavors

From popcorn to watermelon, the Oreo company keeps getting weirder and weirder with its flavors.

Apr 24, 2019

As a kid, I remember coming home from school to my mom handing me a plate of Oreos and a cold glass of milk to go along with it. This small part of the day would get me through the hardships of elementary school (because I had no idea what was coming in middle school and did not cherish the beauty of coloring books) and has caused Oreos to become a sentimental food for me. So, when I show you this list of nasty, disgusting, abhorrent flavors, you will understand why I am so heated.

Rainbow "Shure, Bert!"

I'm so sorry, but whoever came up with this idea needs to be fired on the spot. In what way was this a good idea at all? I sincerely apologize if this is genuinely appetizing to you, but if it is, you probably need to get your head checked out. Oreos are meant to be chocolatey, creamy goodness, not fruity, sherbet weirdness. I've never tried these and I'm not planning on it in the near future.

Candy Corn

Hear me out, I see the appeal Oreo thinks it has with the whole seasonal advertising ploy. The problem is, though, that not a lot of people like candy corn to begin with. It's waxy and 100% sugar. How could this possibly good incorporated into an Oreo? It's not. It's actually one of the worst foods I've ever tasted in my life. When I first saw this I was hesitant, but, because I was in a festive mood, I decided to buy them despite my doubts. I ate half of one of these bad boys and wasted the entire rest of the box because they are absolutely inedible and obviously not meant for human consumption.

Berry Burst Ice Cream

I don't know what Oreo's deal is with ice cream flavors, but it obviously hasn't worked out for them. This looks absolutely nasty to me and I have no intention of ever putting anything like this into my mouth. Maybe their train-of-thought was that an ice cream flavor would be more enticing to consumers during the summer months, but if I want ice cream I will just buy some freaking ice cream, right?

Swedish Fish

I'm sorry, but why? Why is this even a thing? I don't know about you but Swedish Fish is one of those candies I get at Halloween and I just roll my eyes because it's just not good. Why does Oreo insist on putting some of the grossest candies in their cookies? Now, you know I'm a hardcore classic Oreo gal, but a Snickers or Reese's Oreo wouldn't be a half-bad idea. Actually, those are great ideas, but no, Oreo had to choose freaking Swedish Fish of all the possible candies out there. Honestly Oreo, if you are reading this, I'm looking for a job and would be more than happy to work for you.

Watermelon

This one just makes me want to cry. It's so wrong on so many levels and violates Oreos in so many ways. This was the first weird flavor I tasted and I recall it tasting like gum and straight sugar. Absolutely disgusting and unnecessary. Nobody needs this in their life and I have no idea what possessed Oreo to make these. Also, what is Oreo's obsession with fruity flavors? It obviously hasn't worked out so far so why do they keep pushing for these nasty flavors? If you could see my face right now, there are tears rolling down it because I'm recalling the flavor of these nasty cookies.

Overall, you see my disgust and hatred toward Oreo's newfound "creativity" regarding its flavors. My advice to you would be to stick to the classic flavors. Maybe even venture out to the "Double Stuf" Oreos if you're feeling a little crazy.

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1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

Let's face it, last semester you woke up with enough time to brush your teeth and get to class and even then you were about 10 minutes late and rollin' in with some pretty unfortunate bed head. This semester we will set our alarms, wake up with time to get ready, and get to class on time!

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Why Oreo Should Stop Making Weird Flavors

From popcorn to watermelon, the Oreo company keeps getting weirder and weirder with its flavors.

In This Article:

Rainbow "Shure, Bert!"

Candy Corn

Berry Burst Ice Cream

Swedish Fish

Watermelon

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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