This one is for you and how much I hated you for ending something good. There are so many things I'd like to tell you now if I had the chance and patience. No words could describe how much you meant to me and how much I appreciated you. I will never forgive you for ending things when they got hard and you "couldn't handle it" In terms, I really don't think you had a good enough excuse because we know long-distance wasn't the problem.
Now let's define something that "we" attempted.
As Urban Dictionary refers to a "long-distance relationship" is: "A strong emotional commitment to another who is far away and often beyond physical access most of the time. This is something that requires a great deal of maturity and emotion. In many many cases, people can be far too simple-minded or immature to benefit from a long-distance relationship." That last sentence really really hits home. You were very immature about the way you handled it. It all started with things getting a little hard for you to handle and a text you sent saying, "Can I please call you?" and that's where it all ended for us, right? You made it even worse by "checking up on me" and making sure I was okay without you. Well jokes on me, right?
The number of painful goodbyes we said until it was the last one.
Those dreadful goodbyes we had for only 6 months made it even worse when I found out my last one wasn't going to be in person. I can vividly remember leaving your house and it took almost 10 minutes to say goodbye because we never knew when the next time was. I do have to say, I am grateful that I got to say my hardest goodbyes to a person that meant so much to me. These goodbyes were happy ones because you mattered so much to me but I didn't mean that much to you. Now I have to say, you made long-distance hard for yourself, which in terms, you made the goodbyes harder.
Long-distance wasn't hard until you made it hard.
The worst thing you could do was pushing somebody away that would do literally anything for you. I could see it all coming to an end when I realized that you started pushing me away. Here are some problems that should the "red flags": you joined a frat, we argued almost every night, you had to know my every move, and so many more. Why didn't I see these signs? YOU, not me, told me long-distance was getting harder and harder but you never did anything to try and fix it. "I know you're unhappy and so am I" and "Why do you have to make this difficult?" were the phrases that will never leave even since it's been 9 months later. You never once asked "How can I fix this?" like I asked multiple amounts of times. And I always got the answer to "You really can't fix this, it's just 'hard.'"
But, you aren't the only one at fault here.
Here I am to tell you I'm sorry. I wish things could've been easier for the both of us and you could've come home more often, but that's not how I played out. I'm sorry for not understanding the reasoning behind some of the things you did back then. I don't regret ever starting anything with you. I regret how it all ended and how I had to let you go. I'm so glad I had something that made goodbyes so hard but not anymore. I hope you're doing well and that you are living it up in college. All I have is my best wishes for you in that you succeed and enjoy yourself now that we aren't together. You always did well.
Sincerely, Your 'semi-forgiving' ex-girlfriend.
