Dear Curls,
I am so sorry for how I treated you over the past few years. I am truly sorry. I insulted you, I treated you poorly, I even complained about you every single day.
I still remember the first time I got a hair straightener, it was the best thing I had until that moment. I could use it when my hair was wet, so I didn't even have to wait for my hair to dry and see you. Oh, curls, how sorry I am for not even wanting to see you. I remember how easy my routine was every time I showered; I would get out of the shower, wrap my body with a towel, plug the straightener, and wait for it to wamp up. And, then, I would use it on you. I could hear the "tss" every time I was trying to make you better. That is a sound every girl who straights her hair knows too well. It was music to my ears.
I knew I was hurting you, curls, but I didn't care, and I regret that. I regret not caring about that "tss" and about that smell. I regret not feeding you with the right nutrients for you to be beautiful to nourish you and let you be. Do you forgive me, curls? Do you believe I did love you deep down? I promise this is on of those few times where it was really me, not you.
But you have to understand that I didn't know better then. I was a girl who believed it was a straight-hair world, and you made me be an outsider. I know it is not an excuse and the way I treated you is not justifiable, but you understand right? You understand it was not you, it was what society made me feel!
I was not entirely ashamed of you, I actually wished you were curlier or easier to manage. But you didn't cooperate ever. So I got rid of you. I got rid of those unnecessary tangles, and those frizzy ends. I got rid of that mess that made me feel like I was in an 80-degree weather (when it was just 75 degrees).
You look weaker when I let you be, because you were so used to pretend you were something else, and you didn't know how to go back to your normal self. The few times I tried you to let you be you were stubborn. I guess you were trying to prove a point, trying to prove that I lost you forever. I put a lot of product on you and drown you in chemicals that made you look stiff and far from who you really were. I guess this ruined our relationship even more
That is when I realized that I needed you to come back. I guess you never know what you have until it is gone, and once your normal self was gone, I wanted you back. Curls, I hate myself for making you change, for constantly telling you that you are not beautiful and that you are not worth it unless you fit into society. I do regret not letting you be, and I regret not having you in my life the way I used to.
I am glad, though, that I am trying to win you back, and I am showing you that I can let you be and that I do accept you. I do accept your messiness, your frizziness and everything that comes with you. Because that is what makes you-you, and you are unique and incredible.
I am sorry curls,
Orly