It's not unusual to drift apart from people you once believed to be your best friends. It happens. Throughout life we grow and change and sometimes that growth means growing apart from people you never thought you would lose.
Some friendships, no matter how strong you once thought they were, have to end.
To the best friend I could have sworn I would have forever,
I am always going to miss you:
You can't form a bond as close as ours and not miss it when it's gone. Middle school awkwardness brought us together faster than most other friendships I've formed. We met and I swear two days later we had pushed our *thankfully* unlimited texting plans to the limit, and we swore we were never looking back. We swore that nothing was going to change our friendship.
But when we attended different high schools that promise was tested. We tried our best to stay true to each other, but you got to go to school with all of our middle school friends while I was left alone at my new school. I could never explain to you how hard it was to watch you all get closer and create memories that I couldn't even try to be a part of. I didn't get to watch you develop embarrassing crushes, didn't get to see any of you at school dances, didn't get invited to most hangouts, and I didn't get the luxury of entering high school with a set group of friends.
I was left alone. I had to navigate the halls of high school by myself, make my own friends, and pave my own experience. And the experience I chose for myself couldn't have been more different from the one you decided was best for you.
We did our best to keep in touch and hung out whenever we could. It was almost normal for a while, and no matter how much space grew between us we always knew we could text each other immediately if something was wrong. We were there for each other through countless breakdowns and unending drama and we never forgot the silly memories we had made over the years.
But some things tested our friendship too much.
No matter how much I wanted our friendship to stay the same and never change, no matter how hard I clung to our "unbreakable" bond and amazing memories, some things are too hard to push through.
There was one night that I truly believe changed our friendship permanently, and even though we finally talked about it two years later, nothing has been the same since.
Our friendship had already begun to change for the worse, but senior year really put a strain on us. We lasted fairly strong through the end of senior year, you came to my graduation and held my hand as I dealt with the stress and confusion of realizing and understanding my true sexuality (although you claimed you always knew). We were there for each other through every horrible bump of senior year.
But once we left for college I think a part of both of us knew we weren't ever going to be the same.
We became different people.
I guess we became too different.
The people we became weren't entirely compatible anymore. We still loved each other and cherished the friendship and the memories we had. I always will. And I am still always here for you and would drop everything in an instant if you needed me.
But we're different people now and our friendship isn't even close to the same.
I don't know that we were always the healthiest friends, even at the beginning. But we needed each other, and we were always there when we needed someone.
Despite it all we have the most amazing memories.
I'll never regret a moment of our friendship. The memories we have with one another are some of my happiest memories. From passing notes and creating the most ridiculous nicknames for each other in middle school to dressing up and figuring out how to do our makeup and sobbing on each other's shoulders too many times to count, our memories are endless.
We celebrated every major life event from age 12-18 together; birthdays, starting high school, graduation, senior pictures, breakups, first loves, coming out, and so many others!
I will always love you, no matter how many years pass without communication.
You'll always be my best friend, even if the title doesn't quite fit anymore.
Love always,
your best friend
