Dear Santa,
I know it’s been a while since I’ve written to you. The past few years I’ve really been trying to figure out who I am and who I want to be. I’m sure you can relate to the identity crisis with all those non-believers out there, including myself temporarily. But I’ve come to my senses; college has really opened my mind up in general. I want you to know that I’ve grown up a lot, and am a much more mature, selfless person now. I'm about 87 percent sure I'm on the nice list (if you don't count weekends), but this year for Christmas I don’t want toys or games. I finally understand material things aren’t what life is really about.
The first thing I would really love to receive are good grades this semester. The past two weeks I’ve found myself spending more time in the library than not. It's no exaggeration when I say I've officially set up camp on the first floor. I’ve been an awfully good student Santa, I’m just worried the devotion I put into my studies won’t be enough for my professors. Unfortunately, As are not received for effort in college, but if they were you know I'd have a 4.0.
Along with a better GPA, I would totally appreciate it if you could give me a solid career path. I’m struggling hardcore with trying to decide what I want to do with my life and if you could just kinda give me that realization that’d be chill. I spend tons of my time looking at graduate school options as well as program requirements, but have yet to find that one thing I’m going to want to do for the rest of my life. It doesn’t have to be the best career path; if we’re being honest I’d accept stripping at this point. I just want confidence and stability regarding my life and future.
Another gift that would make me happy is to be able to eat all the food I want without gaining any weight. I, too, find myself looking at myself in the mirror asking myself, “Why did I eat all those cookies?” It’s truly a struggle, but I feel the both of us could benefit from the gift of a fast metabolism. So treat yourself this year; don’t just give me a fast metabolism, but do it for yourself too. I believe this is something we both deserve and as the great Tom Haverford says, "Treat yo self."
One last thing I’m asking for this year is to have enough time to sleep; or at the very least be able to physically function well on an average of five and a half hours. Having bags under your eyes is not a fashion statement I’m trying to make; it’s going out of style real quick. And if you're not feeling too original I'd settle on a time turner necklace like the one Hermione has in "Harry Potter."
XOXO
Keri
PS I wouldn’t say no to $1,000 cash. Preferably 20s. Like I know I said that stuff about material items not being important, but I'm hella broke.